


Things Change, But Some Remain

by ComeOnThrillMe



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Coming Out, First Love, First Time, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:27:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 31,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24339619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ComeOnThrillMe/pseuds/ComeOnThrillMe
Summary: What if Voldemort was defeated that night in Godric's Hollow? What if Harry Potter grew up with two loving parents and godfathers that loved him as their own? And what if Harry Potter was gay?Join Harry on his journey through Hogwarts as The-Boy-Who-Lived and watch as he deals with first crushes, first loves, family expectations, and finding who he truly is and what he really wants out of life.
Relationships: Draco Malfoy/Harry Potter, Harry Potter/Oliver Wood
Comments: 10
Kudos: 152





	Things Change, But Some Remain

**Chapter One**

Voldemort was defeated on October 31, 1981. No one knows exactly _how_ an infant managed to destroy one of the most powerful dark wizards of all time, but he did. The war had been difficult on everyone and the Potter family was no exception. Upon joining the Order of the Phoenix, the Potters immediately began to help. Voldemort was growing stronger and gaining more and more followers. Wizards and witches were flocking to become Death Eaters, followers of Lord Voldemort, and terrible times laid ahead.

James and Lily Potter were strong and determined to fight. But soon, Voldemort heard of a prophecy in which a certain infant would need to die in order for Voldemort to continue his reign. Lily and James went into hiding to protect their son, but a friend of the Potter’s quickly revealed their hiding place and were thereby easy targets for Voldemort to find. He entered their home in Godric’s Hollow on October 31st on a mission to find the child, Harry Potter.

He made his way inside the home and was met with the boy’s father, James. A powerful stunning spell landed the wizard on his back and rendered him immobile and unable to protect his family. Voldemort found his way to a room with a glowing light. Inside was the boy’s mother, Lily. She was terrified but stood firm in front of her son’s crib. Voldemort raised his wand and stunned the woman who let out a blood-curling scream. Voldemort decided to not kill the woman but instead, give her a fate worse than death – watching her only son die.

Voldemort raised his wand to kill Harry Potter. He cast the killing curse at the child and was met with a strong burst of light. When James and Lily Potter came to, they found their perfect son sitting in his crib, unharmed. They also found the shriveled remains of the once-powerful Voldemort on their son’s floor. The only way a person could know something had ever happened to their son was by a small lightening shaped scar on his forehead.

Voldemort had been defeated by an infant. No one could explain it. It made absolutely no sense.

But word traveled fast. Harry Potter was now The-Boy-Who-Lived. Word of his name began to travel through Wizarding communities around the world. As his fame spread, Lily and James decided to shield their son from it as much as possible. They wanted their son to grow up with a normal childhood (or as normal as he could). The family was together, and everyone was safe; that’s all they cared about.

**Chapter Two**

If you asked Harry Potter, he would say he had a great childhood. He knew he was famous, and he had been told on several occasions what he was famous for, but every time he heard the story, he always felt like it happened to someone else. How could he, _an infant_ , defeat such a powerful wizard?

His parents tried to shield him from the rumors surrounding him. Some in the wizarding community felt he had to be even more powerful than Voldemort, even as a child, and therefore could possibly be the most powerful wizard there ever was. Others were afraid of him. What if he ended up being the next Voldemort, but worse?

These were the comments that scared Harry growing up. He didn’t want to be evil. He wanted to be Harry.

His parents were always quick to console him when he let his insecurities be known. “You are our perfect son, Harry. You are good.” His father James would say to him frequently when he found his son crying in his bedroom.

Aside from his fame, his childhood was perfect. He grew up in Godric’s Hollow with his two loving parents. From the age of 3, his father would take him in the backyard to fly around on a small, toy broomstick. This quickly became Harry’s favorite thing in the world. He heard all about Quidditch from his father who would also take him to go see matches whenever he could. His father was obsessed with the team Puddlemere United and passed down this love to his son.

His mother told him all about a magical school called Hogwarts that he would attend when he turned 11. This both excited and terrified Harry. He loved the idea of learning about magic and getting to go to a school full of people like him, but he was terrified of ever leaving his parents. He loved them. They were his safety net.

One of his favorite parts of his childhood was when he and his parents would go to the Weasleys’ home, the Burrow. The Weasley family were also part of the Order of the Phoenix and fought alongside Lily and James during the war with Voldemort. The fact that both of their families survived the war brought the two closer together.

Starting at a very young age, Ron Weasley was his best friend. The Weasleys became a second family to Harry. He loved it the Burrow. It was a stark contrast to his life in Godric’s Hollow because the Burrow was always filled with people. The Weasley’s had seven children, so their home was always loud and exciting. Being an only child, Harry loved the idea of having brothers and sisters (but secretly also loved the idea of having his parents all to himself).

Ron also had a deep love of Quidditch. When they were young, James would take the two boys to Puddlemere matches whenever he could. Harry loved seeing his father interact with Ron – almost as if the two were brothers. And Harry knew Ron loved these days too because it was his chance to get away from being one of seven and just be…Ron. Both boys would dress in their Puddlemere jerseys and bring banners in support of their favorite players. 

But if you ever asked Harry what his absolute favorite part of his childhood was, he would say staying over at his godfathers’ house. Harry’s godparents were actually his god _fathers_. They were his father’s best friends from Hogwarts and loved Harry as their own. Sirius and Remus took the role of “godfather” very seriously. They felt it was their duty to show Harry all the amazing things about being a wizard that his parents wouldn’t allow him to see.

After the night of October 31, 1981, Lily was always protective of her son. When Sirius and Remus first started taking Harry to their house for sleepovers, they had to promise to be careful with him and to not let anything happen to him. They promised Lily that when Harry was with them, no harm would ever come to him.

And it never did.

Growing up, Harry never knew that other kids didn’t have two godfathers, they had godparents – a woman and a man. Harry thought it was ‘normal’ to have his Sirius and his Remus. He also thought everyone’s godfather was a dog and a wolf, but that’s a different conversation. Harry didn’t think much of any of this when he was little, this was his version of normal.

When Harry was 9, he started to develop questions. He decided to go to the smartest person he knew, his mother.

“Mum, why do I have two godfathers and no godmother?” Harry and Lily had been sitting on the couch after a mother-son day (which occurred whenever James went out with Sirius and Remus for the day and often turned into a mother-son night as well).

“Well, we couldn’t pick just one godfather for you. So, we gave you two”. Lily looked at her son and could tell this was not exactly what Harry was asking.

“Yes, but why are they two men? Ron said that it isn’t normal.”

“Just because not everyone has two men for godparents, doesn’t mean it isn’t normal. Don’t you love your Sirius and Remus?” Harry had called them ‘his Sirius and Remus’ from the time he could speak properly. It just kind of stuck.

“Of course I do! I love them very much!”

“Then, there you go, what else do you need?”

Harry sat silent for a minute. He had another question but didn’t know how to ask it. “Mum, why do Sirius and Remus kiss like you and dad?”

Lily had a feeling this is where the conversation was going. She took a deep breath and prepared herself. She wanted to make sure she did this right. “Well, sweetie, Sirius and Remus love each other very much. Just like your father and I do. And when two people love each other, they kiss each other. Sometimes a man loves a woman (like me and your father), sometimes a man loves a man (like your Sirius and Remus) and sometimes a woman loves a woman. Does that make sense?”

Harry honestly felt it did. It made a lot of sense. But he couldn’t help but wonder why he had never seen two women together or another couple like his Sirius and Remus. Part of him figured other people were like them, maybe he just had to wait until he was older.

“Yes, that makes sense. Ron says he wishes he had a Sirius and Remus. I think he’s jealous.” Harry grinned from ear to ear. Lily smiled lovingly at her son and waited for more questions. When they didn’t come, she looked away from her son and continued to smile.

**Chapter Three**

Harry boarded the Hogwarts Express at the age of 11, absolutely terrified. He felt if he didn’t have Ron by his side, then he would have never gotten on the train. Ron was his anchor. The two of them made a pact the night before when they had stayed over at Sirius and Remus’ house, “no matter what, we stick together. Even if we are in separate houses. Even if we meet other friends. We stay together – no matter what.” They spit in their hands and shook on it.

The two made their way down the aisle of the train until they found an empty space. Not too long after sitting down, the train started to move, and a young witch appeared at their door. She introduced herself as “Hermione Granger, muggle-born. But I already know loads of magic!”. Harry and Ron gave each other a concerned look but allowed the witch to sit with them. They were actually terrified of what would happen if they didn’t.

While getting to know Hermione, another wizard appeared at their door. He did not look as friendly. He was pale and had platinum blonde hair slicked back. He had already changed into his robes and his whole appearance terrified Harry. He introduced himself as Draco Malfoy and held out his hand for Harry to shake. Harry immediately recognized the last name. “My father says your father was a Death Eater. He says he was a follower of Voldemort and I’m not supposed to trust you. Your father lied to the Ministry and that’s the only reason he’s allowed to be free.”

James Potter had talked about the Malfoys a lot as Harry grew up. After Voldemort’s defeat, many Death Eaters escaped and were never found, but some were captured. Lucius Malfoy was taken into the Ministry of Magic but used the defense that he was under the Imperius Curse and therefore did not know what he was doing. He swore that if he had known, he would not have been a part of any of it.

James always knew this was a lie. He didn’t trust the Malfoys and made sure Harry didn’t either. When James heard that Lucius had a son Harry’s age, James repeatedly told his son to stay away from him at school. Harry never disobeyed his father.

Back on the train, Draco looked embarrassed. He quickly took his hand back and Harry watched him re-compose himself. He looked around the carriage at the other two faces, “Well, at least we respect our pureblood status. We don’t go around associating ourselves with mudbloods.” He immediately turned and looked at Hermione. Harry was sickened by the word, but it was Ron who stood up. “That’s a bad word Malfoy! It’s cruel! Harry and I aren’t interested in you or your friendship. You can leave!” Harry had never seen Ron so confident – part of Harry’s heart swelled. He stared at Draco and watched as he fixed his expression into a scowl and left their carriage.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione became inseparable after that. Luckily, they all ended up in Gryffindor.

**Chapter Four**

Upon arriving, Harry just simply was not prepared for the “fans” he would have upon entering the school. It seemed like people couldn’t get enough of The-Boy-Who-Lived. He found people staring at him during classes and at meals. Sometimes people would approach him and ask for an autograph. He never really knew how to respond to these situations, so he just politely smiled and said, “no thank you”.

Throughout their first year at Hogwarts, Harry learned rather quickly that Hermione was absolutely brilliant. She was easily the best witch in their year. Ron and him on the other hand were average. They hated doing their schoolwork, especially when they found Hogwarts Quidditch.

Harry had been picked for the Quidditch team his first year at Hogwarts. According to everyone, this was unheard of. As terrifying as Harry thought Professor McGonagall was, he couldn’t help but notice the pride in her voice as she quickly placed Harry on the Gryffindor house team. Harry loved going to practices and games, but he knew Ron felt a little left out. He also knew that Draco Malfoy _hated_ the idea of Harry on the house team as a first year. He would constantly find the boy staring at him with a scowl on his face.

Once Harry was on the team, he soon became enamored with the Gryffindor Quidditch captain. He felt this boy was simply…amazing. Oliver Wood _loved_ Quidditch (even more than Ron and Harry!). He would make them practice for hours and hours, day after day – Harry didn’t mind. He would give these stirring speeches before each match and Harry made sure to be front and center and listened very closely. He hung on every word the boy said.

When he went back home for holidays, Harry would talk about the captain with his parents who would exchange looks every time Harry brought Oliver up. Harry would notice the looks, but quickly dismissed them.

Ron joined the team in their second year and things started to fall into place. Hermione would come watch their games and sometimes would attend practices, but she always said “if you boys put half as much focus on your school work as you do Quidditch, you’d be in much better shape!”

Harry loved the idea of having Ron on the team – finally someone to discuss strategy with! Ron also thought Oliver Wood hung the moon. He and Harry would talk about his skills at Quidditch, the way he rode his broom, and his ability to motivate the team.

Draco Malfoy made the Slytherin team that year as well. He even ended up in the same position as Harry, seeker. This only fueled their budding rivalry.

After the end of his second year, the novelty of going to school with the Boy-Who-Lived had worn off and Harry was grateful. For the most part, people stopped staring at him and asking for his autograph. Everyone treated him as a normal person.

Well, mostly everyone.

No matter what he did, he always found Draco Malfoy staring at him. The boy would find any excuse to insult Harry. When the three of them would walk down the hallway, Harry could hear Draco whispering “mudblood” and “blood traitor”. But Harry always tried his best to stay strong. He could hear Sirius’ voice in his head, “Never stoop to a bully’s level. That’s how they win.”

When they all returned for their third year, Harry noticed a change in Draco. He seemed…angrier and more aggressive. Draco became hell-bent on knocking Harry off his broom during Quidditch matches that year and his insults seemed to increase.

Harry felt he could no longer hold back. His emotions felt more out of control than they ever did in the past. One day, after leaving Defense Against the Dark Arts, Harry felt Draco run into him. Draco walked ahead with his two goons intact – Crabbe and Goyle. Draco made a point to turn around and say “Watch it Potter! Don’t need you up against me like some poof.” Draco and his friends let out a hard laugh.

Harry went red and without thinking began to charge at Draco. He heard Ron yell something behind him, but he couldn’t hear him over the sound of his own heart racing.

“What did you say Malfoy?” Harry was livid when he ran up on Draco.

“It’s just maybe your poof godfathers are rubbing off on you Harry. I wouldn’t be surprised.” Draco’s smile was pure evil in that moment. Harry could feel his blood boiling.

“Potter. You won’t do anything. You never do. A coward, just like your father. Yeah, Snape (you know, MY _straight_ godfather) has told me all about your father. How shite he was in school and how he never fought for anything in his life. Just ran away. When the dark lord returned, what did James Potter do? He ran.”

That was it. Harry couldn’t handle it anymore. Without thinking, he held up his wand and magic flew out of him. Draco, Crabbe and Goyle all went flying back and hit the wall – hard.

Professors Snape and McGonagall came running around the corner and quickly took the children away. Snape took the three boys to the Hospital Wing while McGonagall ushered Harry to a separate room. She began asking him what happened, and he honestly couldn’t even remember. He knew Draco had been insulting him and he knew he used magic, but he had no idea how. He didn’t even remember saying a spell…

The incident earned him two months of detention and no Quidditch. It also earned him a letter home which made Harry feel even worse than the Quidditch. He knew his father would be disappointed, but worse, he knew his godfathers would be disappointed.

When Harry returned home that summer, his father sat him down.

“Harry, I need you to tell me _exactly_ what happened – in your own words.” James Potter was very serious with his son. He didn’t love getting a letter from the school, but this was honestly out of character for his son and he needed to know _why_ his son did what he did.

Harry told him the full story. He knew his father would be able to tell if he left out any parts.

“I see…” was all James could say. He agreed with his son’s actions, but he knew he couldn’t say that. He didn’t want to condone his son engaging in violence. When he looked at his son, he could see tears swelling in his eyes.

“Harry, why are you crying?” His son looked at him with the most pitiful look.

“I don’t really care what they said about you, dad. I mean, I do, but I also know it isn’t true. You’re the bravest person I know…well, next to mum.” James smiled at his son, “then why get so angry, son?”

Harry paused. When he thought back on it, two things really upset and scared him in that moment. “The word they called my Sirius and Remus…it’s a bad word, a really hurtful word. That caused me to get really upset. But I also can’t stop thinking about what happened with my magic…dad, I didn’t even say a spell. I don’t even think I was going to cast one! It just came out of nowhere!”

James looked at his scared son. “Harry, you’re right, that word is awful and I’m not mad at you for getting upset about it. As for your magic, sometimes that happens. Sometimes, when we get really upset, our magic takes over. That’s why you’re at Hogwarts – they’ll teach you how to work on it, okay?”

“Okay dad. I’m really sorry…”. “I know son, I know”. James held his son in his arms and rocked him back and forth. There was more James wanted to say but knew he shouldn’t. The way Harry’s magic reacted wasn’t entirely normal. James knew Harry was a strong wizard, but he also knew Harry wasn’t ready to know that just yet.

**Chapter Five**

Harry’s fourth year at Hogwarts brought even more excitement. At their opening feast, Headmaster Dumbledore announced that Hogwarts would play host to that year’s TriWizard Tournament. This was an event Harry wasn’t too familiar with but was excited that new students would be entering the school. They were told that, as hosts, they would house students from both Beauxbaton’s Academy of Magic in France and the Durmstrang Institute of Magical Learning in the north.

The tournament itself sounded awfully dangerous, but just like everyone else, he was excited to see who would be representing Hogwarts. Harry sat at attention on the day where everyone was called into the Great Hall and names were pulled from a beautiful goblet. Dumbledore explained all of the rules beforehand on how students who were interested in participating could enter their names but made sure to go into great detail on the age restrictions. Harry knew that Dumbledore wanted to be clear on the dangers associated with the tournament, as well as the glory that would come with winning.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione sat with the rest of Gryffindor and anxiously waited to see whose name would be pulled for Hogwarts.

The first name out of the goblet was the champion from Beauxbaton – Fleur Delacour. Harry heard a whimper escape Ron’s mouth as Hermione hit him over the head. Ron had fallen in love with this girl from the moment she arrived. Granted, he had never spoken to her, but he talked about her all the time. Harry felt it was rather annoying really. Hermione thought so too, but Harry suspected it was for other reasons.

The second name was the champion from Durmstrang – Viktor Krum. This time, it was Hermione’s turn to let out a sound. It was a barely audible gasp, but Harry heard it and turned to look at her. She looked concerned for a brief second, then went back to reading the book she had brought. Harry had heard a lot about Krum, of course he knew of him, anyone who loved Quidditch like Harry did knew Viktor Krum. The man had been playing professionally since the age of 15. He was like a Quidditch prodigy.

The last name was from Hogwarts. Harry listened as Dumbledore let out a bellowing “Cedric Diggory!”. As Cedric rose to accept his position, Harry felt his heart stop. Harry knew Cedric. Well, he didn’t exactly _know_ him, but he knew of him. He’d seen him around quite a bit over the past 3 years. But Harry’s reaction didn’t exactly make sense to him. He barely knows this guy, why does he suddenly care so much that he’s the Hogwarts champion? Harry looked around quickly and noticed no one cared about this as much as he seemed to, so he turned his attention back to Ron and began discussing which of the three was most likely to win.

Fourth year was a difficult year. In addition to the excitement of the Tournament, there was also excitement over a mandatory dance, the Yule Ball, that was to take place before winter holiday. Harry didn’t really care to go, and he certainly didn’t have an interest in asking anyone to go with him. Ron was adamant that they go, so Harry said okay and felt the three of them should go together. Ron was quick to point out that that was ridiculous and went on a quest to find Harry and himself dates.

Hermione found a date rather quickly but refused to say who it was with. This annoyed Ron and pushed him to find a date even harder.

When Harry was set up with one of the Patil sisters, he was rather annoyed. He really didn’t understand why he and Ron couldn’t go together. But every time he mentioned this, he was met with Ron saying, “Harry. We’re 14 years old. It’s time to get out there, mate! Don’t you want a girlfriend?”

Harry actually…didn’t. He found some girls pretty, like Hermione or Cho Chang (who was now dating Cedric Diggory). But he didn’t have a strong interest in _dating_ them. And he certainly didn’t have the strong interest that Ron did.

Harry felt frustrated upon hearing about Cedric and Cho going to the dance together. He told himself (and Ron) that it was because he liked Cho and wanted to ask her, but he wasn’t sure if that was entirely true.

The dance was a let-down, just like Harry knew it would be. Hermione showed up with Viktor Krum, which surprised everyone except Ron. Ron was less surprised and more…angry about the situation. Harry had a feeling why, but let it slide and decided to be there for his friend during his anger.

The Patil sisters quickly realized that neither Harry nor Ron were happy to be there with them. They left them as soon as they could, and Harry didn’t really blame them.

Draco Malfoy’s appearance at the ball was obnoxious as usual. After Harry’s magic outburst last year, Draco had taken a backseat to his direct insults at Harry, but that didn’t change who he was as a person.

He still walked around with a strong sense of arrogance and pride. His dress robes for the dance were immaculate. Harry looked at them and _knew_ they must have cost a small fortune. When Draco noticed Harry staring, he took it as an opportunity to be his awful self, “close your mouth Potter. _Some_ people might get the wrong idea.” Harry simply rolled his eyes and looked away.

Harry actually found himself watching Cho and Cedric quite a bit during the dance. Cho looked beautiful, of course. But Cedric. Cedric looked…perfect. He watched as the man glided around the dance floor with Cho and never looked away. He looked at the way Cedric’s dress robes flowed around him but hugged in just the right places. He looked at the way Cedric smiled while he danced with Cho and the way he would whisper in her ear before they both would look at each other and giggle.

Harry continued this until he heard Ron say, “hey mate, stop staring. I know you really wanted to ask out Cho, but she’s with someone else. You just got to let her go.”

Ron and Harry left the dance after that and decided to not talk about the night ever again.

The TriWizard Tournament was, indeed, extremely dangerous. Each task left the impression that one of the champions’ lives would be in danger, but thankfully they all came out of it alive.

The last task was a terrifying maze in which the champions would have to find their way to the center and locate the tournament cup. The person who found it first, would win. Harry was smart enough to know it wasn’t that simple. He had heard from several people that the maze changed people and made you see/hear things that weren’t actually there…and some things that were.

When Cedric left the maze, cup in hand, the entire school cheered. Harry watched as Cedric’s father ran down from the stands and met his son. Harry’s heart swelled. He told himself it was pride from seeing their champion win and witnessing a tender moment between father and son, but something told him he was fooling himself.

**Chapter Six**

By the time his fifth year came around, Harry knew he couldn’t fool himself any longer. His obsession with Oliver Wood, his fascination with Cedric Diggory, and now his _very clear_ interest in Dean Thomas. It was all becoming too much to ignore.

Harry felt foolish. Dean was a boy he had known for four years by this point. He shared a dormitory with him! This was his friend! But for some reason, he couldn’t help but notice his sudden attraction.

Coming back that year, Harry would catch himself looking at Dean while he studied in the common room. He liked the way he bit at the end of his quill while he was working. He liked the way he crossed his feet but tapped them at the same time even if no music was playing.

He also found himself staring at Dean while they all got ready for bed. These boys had grown up together. They had changed in front of each other loads of times, and yet, here he was. Staring. He tried to rationalize it by saying, “You’re just curious. You just need to get a girlfriend”. But he knew that wouldn’t help. He didn’t want a girlfriend…he wanted Dean.

Harry began to make any excuse to be around the guy. Even though he exclusively did his work with Hermione and Ron, now he was suddenly inviting Dean to study with him in the library. He knew Dean didn’t like Quidditch very much but would invite him to go flying with him anyway. And on weekends, when they were allowed to go to the nearby wizarding community of Hogsmeade, Harry would invite Dean to come with him, Ron, and Hermione for lunch.

If you asked Harry, he thought he was being smooth. But Hermione caught on quick. After a trip to Hogsmeade, in which Hermione found Harry sitting a little too close to Dean and laughing at literally everything the boy said, Hermione decided to speak to her best friend.

When they all returned from a trip to Hogsmeade and entered the common room, Hermione waited for the rest of Gryffindor house to make their way to their dorms before gently asking her friend to talk.

“Harry…do you like Dean?” Harry looked up in fright. Hermione’s suspicions were confirmed right then.

“Um, yeah, he’s cool. He’s our friend, you know?” Harry tried to make his voice sound as causal as possible.

“Yeah…he is cool. I just notice you’ve been hanging around him a lot more. So, I’ll ask again. Harry, do you like Dean Thomas? As more than a friend…?”

Harry’s mouth went dry. He wasn’t prepared for this conversation, but at the same time – he needed to have it. Before he knew it, he was crying on Hermione’s shoulder while she comforted him “Harry, it’s okay! It’s really _really_ okay.”

Harry felt a rush of relief wash over him. Deep down, he knew Hermione wouldn’t care. But part of him just really wasn’t ready to face it all yet.

“Harry, I’m happy we could talk about this. You don’t ever need to feel like you have to hide something from me, okay? I want to be there for you when you start to have an interest in someone, okay?” Harry nodded.

“But Harry, I don’t think Dean is interested in men…” And there it was. A fact Harry knew, but hadn’t wanted to really think about.

“I-I know Hermione. I just…can’t help it. There’s something about him. I really _really_ like him and I’m terrified.”

Hermione took a long pause. “I know Harry and it’s okay. He does seem to enjoy being around you too. Maybe he likes both? Some people are like that.”

Harry knew that was also a possibility. A small part of him allowed himself to have hope, until one day near the end of term.

Harry and Dean had been hanging out quite a bit that year. After his talk with Hermione, Harry allowed himself to enjoy his time with Dean. He also allowed himself to think there might be a possibility Dean could like him too. Dean always wanted to be around Harry, he never said “no” when Harry suggested they hang out. He always sat really close to Harry during meals and would engage in really deep conversations late at night in the common room.

On one of these nights, the two had stayed up until 2 in the morning talking. They talked about Dean’s family and what it was like growing up in the muggle world. They talked about Harry’s fame and how difficult it was growing up with that surrounding you. Over the course of the evening, the two had gotten rather close next to the fire that kept dying out, only for Dean to bring it back to life.

After a rather intense conversation about what they hoped for their future, post-Hogwarts, Harry felt a rush wash over him. He slowly moved towards Dean, looked him in the eye, and went for it. He felt his lips latch on to Dean’s before Dean quickly pulled away. The look on Dean’s face will be etched into Harry’s memory forever. It looked like he had just made the biggest mistake of his life and had been caught doing it. Harry’s mind went blank and just stared at the beautiful, shocked boy in front of him.

Dean bounced back faster than Harry and let out a quick, “We-we shouldn’t have done that.”

Harry had waited so long for this moment, he refused to let it happen without a conversation. Harry forced his brain to catch up and speak. “Why? I-I like you…as more than just…a friend.”

“No Harry. No. I’m sorry, but no. I don’t feel that way about you. I’m – I’m sorry Harry if I gave you that impression, but I-I like someone else. A girl. I like girls.”

There it was. Harry knew this was a possibility but had stupidly allowed himself to get his hopes up.

“Harry, please don’t tell anyone about this. Okay?” Dean gave Harry a look of fear and worry.

Harry just nodded and watched the boy he liked rise from the fire and run upstairs. Harry decided to wait so they wouldn’t cross paths while up there. He found himself staring into the fire and crying.

Harry was heartbroken. He was angry at himself for thinking he and Dean could be something. He was angry at himself for letting himself feel this way for someone…for another boy. Harry knew he shouldn’t care – his godfathers were gay, and he loved them! He knew it was okay…he just wasn’t sure if it was okay for him.

Harry told Hermione everything the next day and she encouraged him to talk to Ron. She knew he needed his best friend for this.

So, he did.

After classes ended that day, he took Ron for a walk outside and told him, “I need to tell you something important.” Ron had never seen his friend like this and was terrified.

When Harry told Ron about Dean, Ron just sat quiet for a long time before saying, “So…so does this mean you’re gay? You like guys?”

Harry honestly didn’t know what to say. Part of him wanted to say “Yes! Absolutely!” because, if he was being honest with himself, he did. But he also knew that this would be a big step and didn’t feel ready.

“I-I’m not sure. I liked Dean…and that’s why I’ve been acting like I have.” Harry knew Ron had noticed but was too polite to say anything.

“Well, honestly mate, I’m relieved. I’ve been waiting a long time for you to like someone. I mean, I personally think it’s weird you ended up liking someone we’ve shared a room with since we were 11, but…I guess I can’t really talk”. Ron looked down and Harry knew Ron was thinking about Hermione.

“So, if I was gay…you wouldn’t mind?” Ron looked up quickly and had an angry expression on his face.

“Of course not! Harry, I don’t care what you are. We’ve been friends since we could walk – you think I’d ever let you get away?”

Harry felt tears swelling up in his eyes and pushed them back down. The two decided to end on that note and walk back inside. When Hermione saw them enter the common room, she rushed them and pulled them into a big hug. Her arms lingered on Ron a bit too long before she pulled away completely before saying, “See Harry! I told you Ron wouldn’t care!”

Two weeks after the incident and one week before they were set to head home, Harry was honestly feeling better. He and Dean had not spoken since that night and Harry kept having to force himself to not look at the boy. He didn’t realize how much he had done it before.

Harry was excited for exams to end and was mentally preparing himself to head home when a sight stopped him dead in his tracks. Harry, Hermione, and Ron had been eating in the Great Hall when Harry heard Seamus let out a whistle. When Harry looked up, he was met with seeing Dean and Ginny Weasley holding hands and kissing. Any ‘feeling better’ he had previously felt was gone.

Harry felt his heart fall. Ron looked ready to murder Dean for many reasons and Hermione simply put her arm around Harry. Harry knew he should look away, but he couldn’t. Dean looked…happy.

Harry felt jealousy rising up inside him and quickly realized he was jealous of his best mate’s sister. She got to kiss Dean. She got to make him smile like that. And when they finished kissing, Dean didn’t pull back in shock or disgust or anger. He kept smiling…

The last week of his fifth year was a blur as was the train ride home. When his mum picked him up at the station, Harry couldn’t speak. As soon as he got in the car and they started driving away from King’s Cross Station, Harry broke down in sobs. He hadn’t realized how long he had been holding it in.

Lily Potter didn’t know what happened, but she knew her Harry was hurting. She continued their drive home because she knew she needed to get her son home. As soon as they entered the door, before Lily could say anything, Harry drug his trunk upstairs and slammed his door. James stared at his wife in shock and confusion.

Harry knew he should be happy to be home. It was honestly his favorite place in the world. But right now, in this moment, he couldn’t bring himself to be happy. He had moved past hurt and back to angry. Once again angry at himself for feeling these stupid feelings and angry at himself for feeling jealous of _Ginny Weasley_ of all people. She was like a sister to him! Of course she should be happy!

But Dean… that’s all he kept thinking about…Dean….

**Chapter Seven**

The summer between fifth and sixth year was hard. Harry wanted to be left alone as much as possible, which was very rare for him. He always wanted to be around his parents. Even as he had gotten older and all of his friends kept talking about how “lame” their parents were, Harry never felt that. His parents were perfect. And that’s exactly why he couldn’t be around him. They’d want to _talk_ to him, and he didn’t feel he had it in him.

James and Lily tried many times to be there for their son. But each time, they were met with silence or “It’s nothing. Drop it.” They hated to see their son like this, so they decided to bring in reinforcements.

James and Lily decided to plan a get-away just for the two of them. It would act as a treat for their anniversary, while also allowing them to ship Harry off to Sirius and Remus for a week.

For the first time in his entire life, Harry didn’t want to see his godfathers. He couldn’t. He knew that if he had to talk to them, he would end up breaking down and spilling everything.

But he really didn’t have a choice in the matter and ended up on the doorstep of his godfathers’ house exactly three weeks before his return to Hogwarts.

His godfathers did not try to talk to Harry like his parents had. Instead, they let him be. They figured whatever Harry was dealing with, he would tell them when he was ready.

And they were right. The day before he was set to go back to his parents, Harry couldn’t help himself. All of the thoughts and feelings that he had been bottling up over the summer were ready to spill out. While the three of them sat in silence eating dinner, Harry spoke. “How did you guys know you were gay?”

Sirius choked on his green beans and Remus looked at Harry with a smile. Without missing a beat, Remus began, “Well Harry, I think I started to have a suspicion around the age of 13 – there was a really cute boy at school, older of course, that I couldn’t stop looking at. But I didn’t know for sure until I met this one.” Harry smiled as Remus pointed towards Sirius, who looked embarrassed.

Remus continued, “You know the story well by now, but we started off as friends and it blossomed from there. My heart soared when I was with him and hurt when I was without.” Harry smiled and turned his attention toward his other godfather who looked ready to chime in.

“I was a little different Harry. I took a long time to come to terms with it myself. I guess, like Remus, I also always kind of knew. But my family was not very supportive of homosexuality (as you know by now, my family were not great people). But yes, when I met Remus, I did have feelings that I knew were different. I didn’t want to acknowledge them for a very _very_ long time.” Sirius turned to look at Remus, took his hand, and smiled. “But, when this one decided to show his Gryffindor bravery and kiss me that day sixth year in the astronomy tower…well, I couldn’t deny it after that…”. The two men looked at each other for a very long time before finally breaking out of their haze. “Why do you ask Harry?”

Harry could have sworn there was a suspicious tone in that question but decided to ignore it. These were his godfathers. They loved him. He loved them. If he couldn’t talk to them, then who would he talk to?

“I – I think I’m gay.” Harry looked down as he said it and refused to look up.

There was silence on the other end of the table and Harry was confused. He looked up and was met with two very large smiles. Remus was the first to speak, “We know Harry.”

Harry couldn’t control himself and his mouth fell open in surprise while his godfather continued. “We’ve known for a while…”. Sirius laughed and added on “Yeah, we’ve known since you were 11 and wouldn’t stop talking about that Quidditch boy! What was his name Remus? Chestnut or something?”

Harry remained in shock. “Oliver Wood?! You’ve known since I was 11 and didn’t say anything to ME about it?!”

“Harry, what were we going to say? We knew you’d tell us when you were ready. And besides, that’s for you to discuss – not us.”

Harry didn’t know what to say but found himself letting out an exhale he didn’t know he had been holding.

“Harry…is that why you’ve been acting this way? Did something…did something happen at school?” Remus had a strong tone of concern as he asked the question.

Harry felt he had come this far, might as well tell them everything. So, he did. He watched as their faces went from smiling to hurt.

When he was done, Remus reached out a hand and took Harry’s, “I’m so sorry Harry, I’m sorry you had to go through that heartbreak. But I want you to know that not every boy will react that way. It sounds like Dean just didn’t know how to handle that.”

Harry knew his godfather was right. Sirius continued, “That’s right Harry! I bet the next boy you kiss will _love it_. And if he doesn’t, screw him! Find another!” Harry couldn’t help himself, he allowed himself to laugh for what felt like the first time that summer.

The conversation after became lighter and the three of them ended up talking and laughing until late in the night. Harry had decided to go to bed, but as soon as he laid down, he heard a knock on his door. His godfathers had made sure Harry had his own room at their house from the moment he was born. The room had changed along with Harry. It currently had Quidditch posters around the room and several pictures of Harry, Hermione, and Ron and many more of Sirius, Remus, and Harry.

“Come in” Harry remarked as his godfather, Sirius, entered the room.

“Just came to check-in on you. Wanted to make sure you were okay.”

Harry’s heart fluttered. He gave a half smile, “yeah, I’m okay. Thanks…but you don’t have to always check on me.” Sirius moved to sit next to Harry on the bed.

Sirius let out a small laugh, “Oh, no, I really do. I promised your parents 15 years ago that nothing bad would happen to you while you were with me. At the time, I think they were thinking more _physical_ , but I meant it in all ways – physically, mentally, and emotionally. I will always check on you Harry.”

Harry leaned up on the bed and hugged his godfather.

Harry thought the conversation was over, but found his godfather still sitting on the side of his bed. “Harry, we do need to talk though.”

Harry couldn’t help but notice the seriousness in his voice and sat up straight. “Is…is everything okay?”

“Yes! Yes of course!” Sirius knew he had scared his godson and switched his tone quickly. “I just want to make sure you know…I’m here for you. If you have any _questions_ about…anything. You can ask me. I know it’s probably embarrassing to ask your parents and honestly, there are a number of things they probably won’t be able to help you with. So, I’m here.”

The realization dawned on Harry’s face and he felt extremely embarrassed. He actually DID know quite a bit about the subject. He had found wizarding magazines in his godfathers’ room last year. He swiped one and had used it as…research. Now that Harry thought back on it, he wondered if his godfathers knew he took it…

“Um…thanks, Sirius. I’m…I’m okay for now. But…I’ll come to you if I do need anything.” As embarrassed as Harry felt in the moment, he also felt very safe. He appreciated his godfather for coming to him and offering to talk with him about this. He also suspected, if the situation did arise, he would need to talk with him eventually. Just, not right now.

Sirius seemed to feel this answer was adequate and patted Harry on the back before saying goodnight and leaving his room.

James and Lily came back and found a much happier Harry. They decided not to comment on the change, but instead, thanked Sirius and Remus in private. When they asked what they had done to help him, the two exchanged looks and said, “Nothing special, just talked.”

With only a couple of days left before his return to Hogwarts, Harry decided to come out to his parents. He knew they would be okay with it, but part of him was still very nervous. There’s a difference between your best friends being gay and your own son.

Harry sat them down in the living room and without giving it much of an introduction, stood in front of both of them and said, “I’m gay.”

He quickly realized this was the first time he had fully said it aloud and was beginning to feel a little queasy. Both of his parents just stared at him before his mother jumped up and gave him a huge hug. She began to squeeze him tight and tell him, “I’m so proud of you! My beautiful boy!” Harry soon realized she was crying.

He looked at his father and suddenly felt very nervous. As his mother began to release him, his father stood up and started walking towards him. The two made eye contact and Harry let out a quiet, “Dad?” before he too was wrapping his arms around his son.

Harry was overwhelmed by the response.

When his dad pulled back, Harry couldn’t help himself, he needed to say _something_. “So, it’s okay…?”

“Of course son! We love you!” His mother was still crying.

“Is this why you were so upset, son? You didn’t want to tell us?” Harry looked at his parents and decided to tell the story of Dean once again. And once again, he was met with the same worried and sad faces. When it was over, his parents moved-in to hug him once again. In this moment, Harry felt extremely loved.

**Chapter Eight**

Harry boarded the Hogwarts Express for his sixth year, feeling like a new man. His experience with Dean, while extremely heart-breaking, had actually led to some pretty great moments this summer. Harry was excited to get back to school, to see his friend, to play Quidditch and hopefully move-on from the event with Dean.

When Harry, Ron, and Hermione boarded the train they started to search for a place to sit. When they neared the end, they opened a carriage only to be met face-to-face with a rather obscene image of Ginny and Dean.

Ron immediately went red and slammed the door back. Hermione looked at Harry with pity, but Harry stood strong. He refused to let this get to him this year. Dean had occupied enough of his time and energy – it was time to move on. And honestly, seeing him with Ginny was even better. At least this way Harry couldn’t get his hopes up about what could have been…

Harry decided to walk into Hogwarts with his head held high. He had great friends, _amazing_ parents, and godparents that loved him unconditionally. This was going to be a great year.

While lost in his own thoughts, he caught a glimpse of blonde. His eyes fell on Draco Malfoy instantly. He told himself it was because he had trained himself over the years to find the man – and avoid him at all costs. But the more he looked, the more he noticed. Draco had changed over the summer. He no longer looked like the skinny, arrogant, git Harry had come to know. This Draco looked… _hot._

Harry stopped himself immediately. Absolutely not. This is not a road we are allowing ourselves to go down. Draco Malfoy most certainly does not look hot.

But as his mind was thinking it, his eyes were taking in a full view. Draco had grown at least 4 inches over the summer and became more built. Sure, he still looked pretty skinny, but Harry could tell muscles had formed while looking closely at his robes, which led Harry’s mind to quickly wonder - was Draco Malfoy working out over the summer?

As if he could hear his thoughts, Draco turned to see Harry staring. Harry was expecting another altercation like their one in third year and was fully prepared to reach for his wand, when he suddenly noticed Draco’s face change. Draco was…smiling at Harry. Harry threw a quick smile before quickly turning away. His face flushed and he felt his heart race.

What on Earth was going on? Why did he just check out Draco Malfoy, then _smile_ at him?

Harry decided to push the thoughts away and make his way to his house table for the sorting and the feast. The first night back was awkward. Harry and Dean had always slept in beds next to one another – the boys in the Gryffindor dormitory were creatures of habit and never thought to change their sleeping arrangements after five years together.

While getting ready for bed that first night, Harry locked eyes with Dean who quickly looked away. Harry couldn’t quite read the expression on Dean’s face but reminded himself of his plan for this year – “We are moving on, Harry! Time to re-focus on school and _maybe_ you’ll find someone new later…and maybe he’ll be blonde.” Harry caught the last thought and let out an audible groan then turned to shut his curtains and fall asleep.

After only three weeks back, sixth year was shaping up to be the most difficult year yet. Hermione constantly looked like she was going to pull her hair out and Ron looked like he would fall asleep anywhere at any time. Harry also thought he started to see little looks exchanged between the two friends. Neither of them seemed to comment on it, but Harry could tell something was shifting in the friendship.

Harry found himself stretched thin trying to balance his schoolwork and his role as Quidditch captain. The Dean situation was starting to move on, but Harry still felt a small pit of jealousy when Dean would walk Ginny to Quidditch. Often, Dean would say a quick “hello Harry”, before walking away without a reply from Harry.

Harry also quickly found himself fascinated with a blonde at the Slytherin table. He would look up from his meal in the Great Hall and find Draco’s eyes fixed on him. The look in Draco’s eyes made a heat rise up Harry’s neck and he would quickly look away. This continued at every meal until one night in late September.

Harry had been walking down the hall, late at night, when he thought he heard sniffling coming from the boy’s lavatory. Thinking it was a sad, pitiful first year dealing with homesickness, he entered. He was met with Draco Malfoy’s eyes staring back at him in a mirror. Harry could tell immediately that Draco had been crying and froze. Harry thought, for sure, Draco would reach for his wand to hex him, but instead, he whipped around and let out a sharp, “What do you want Potter?”. The way Draco said “Potter” reminded Harry of third year and made him defensive. He put on a brave face and said, “nothing” before walking back out.

Harry went back to his room but couldn’t stop thinking about the incident. His mind kept turning over, what was Draco crying about? Draco Malfoy didn’t cry…

Their routine staring session at meals stopped completely. Mostly because Draco stopped showing up for meals. After two weeks, Harry began to feel uneasy about the absence. He decided that the next time he saw Draco – mostly like after Defense Against the Dark Arts later that day, he would try and talk with him.

Harry watched from his seat as Draco entered the room in a surprisingly good mood. He seemed to be laughing with Crabbe and Goyle, with his girlfriend Pansy following close behind. Harry was strangely happy to see Draco happy for once, but something about his demeanor was off-putting. This was the same boy who only two weeks ago had been sobbing in the boy’s bathroom and refused to attend any of his meals. And now he suddenly was…giddy?

Ron noticed Harry staring at Malfoy…again and poked him in his side. “Mate, you _have_ to stop staring at Malfoy. It’s getting out of hand, really.” Harry turned defensive, “I’m not staring, Ron! I’m just…concerned.” Harry looked at Hermione who was giving him a pitiful look.

“I’m sorry Harry, but Ron’s right. You’ve been staring at him quite a bit since we returned. I mean, every girl in school (and several guys) have noticed the change in him, but you really have to hide it better.”

Harry was taken aback by the comment. “That’s NOT why I’ve been looking at him!”

Harry knew the level of his voice was too high when a majority of the class, including Draco, turned to look at him. He caught Draco’s eyes and was met with that same stare. Harry hadn’t realized how much he missed that stare until a familiar heat went up his neck.

Harry looked away quickly and snapped back at his friends, “I’m just…concerned is all.”

Ron noticed Harry’s flush, “sure, mate… ‘concerned’. If that’s what we want to call it.” Ron let out a small laugh before turning his attention to Professor Snape who was beginning to start class.

Harry left Defense frustrated. After the incident in class, he didn’t even want to talk to Draco anymore. That’s not entirely true, he did. He really did. But after his outburst, he couldn’t risk being seen trying to talk with him.

Harry wanted to get out of the classroom as soon as he could. He was tossing his books into his bag when, in his haste, he knocked one over onto the floor in front of his table. He let out a groan but quickly stopped when he looked to see someone bending down to pick it up for him. Harry hated himself for how he watched Draco bend over and get the book. But he also hated Draco for bending down like that. Honestly, who _slowly_ bends down to pick up a book?

Draco turned around to give Harry his book with a sly grin. “Potter, why is it when I look at you, I always find your mouth open? You didn’t need to throw your book on the floor to get a good look at my arse. You could have just asked.” Draco winked and Harry felt his entire stomach drop.

Was Draco Malfoy…flirting with him?

“Piss off, Malfoy” Ron bit back quickly and the tone snapped Harry out of his trance. He watched as Draco sauntered out of the room.

Harry remained in a daze for the rest of the day. That night, he replayed the scene in his head over and over again. His body reacted immediately, and Harry groaned. “Great…” he whispered to himself in the dark before he rolled over and went to sleep.

Not even two months back and the Hogwarts rumor-mill was back up and running. Harry had, fortunately, never been in the rumor-mill but over the years had found that the mill proved to be scary accurate.

Most of the rumors it churned out, turned out to be true. Which is why when Ginny approached the Gryffindor table one morning and said, “Have you heard the rumor?” – Harry was hooked. Hermione rolled her eyes, she liked to pretend she hated gossip, but Harry knew she’d keep listening anyway.

When everyone at the table shook their heads, Ginny continued, “Yeah, I heard from someone on the Ravenclaw team that Draco Malfoy’s been DUMPED.” Harry couldn’t help but wonder if that’s why Draco had been so upset the past few weeks. Maybe he and Pansy had been on the rocks for a while.

“About time Pansy finally dumped his sorry arse.” Ron chimed in before rolling his eyes.  
“No! That’s just it! It gets _better_. He and Pansy apparently weren’t dating…he was allegedly dating a boy. Blaise Zabini.”

Harry dropped the fork in his hand. Dean turned and looked at him, but quickly looked away.

“No way! Malfoy’s a poof?!” Seamus’ remark was met with intense looks from several members of the table. “What? What did I say…?”

“That’s not the point Seamus. And besides, that’s an offensive word. I think we’re all just…surprised is all.” Harry couldn’t believe his ears. Dean had just defended Draco and reprimanded his best friend in the meantime. He looked at Harry again and gave a small smile. Harry had no idea what to do in return.

Harry tried to not think about the new information but kept finding himself thinking about Draco. This explains so much actually. His moods, his absences, and his…flirting the other day.

That night, Harry couldn’t sleep. He kept tossing and turning and thinking about Draco. Finally, he decided he couldn’t take it anymore and decided to go for a walk around the school. He knew it was past curfew, but he also found these late-night walks to be strangely exhilarating and calming.

As he passed a boy’s lavatory, he heard a familiar sound. He took a deep breath and pushed the door open. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting to find, but a drunk Draco Malfoy crying on the bathroom floor certainly wasn’t it. Harry quickly surveyed the room and saw the bottle of Firewhisky in Draco’s hand as well as Draco’s school uniform completely wrecked. This, usually perfect boy, was a complete mess and slouching on a bathroom floor.

Once he snapped back to the situation, he heard Draco yell “Perfect Potter! Come to join me?!” Harry noticed Draco wave the near-empty bottle around. 

“Um…no. I heard crying and thought I would come to check…on you. Draco, are you okay?” Harry couldn’t bring himself to speak above a whisper on the last sentence.

“Oh, Potter. Always so serious! I’m fineeeeee.” Harry started to move closer.

“It’s okay if you’re not Draco. I- I heard what happened… We can, talk about it if you want…” Harry had no idea where all of this coming from, but it felt like the right thing to do.

“Oh! So you heard, did you? Tell me Potter – what did you hear, huh?” Harry didn’t know how to respond. Luckily, he didn’t have to – Draco wasn’t finished.

“What? Did you hear how I was a poof? Cause that’s what I’ve been hearing too. I’ve been hearing that I like to take it up the arse and that I’ve been dumped!” Draco let out a laugh that made Harry uncomfortable. “I suppose you’re hear to rub it in, huh? Get back at me for making all those comments about your godfathers? Hex me for calling you a ‘poof’ all those years ago? Well, have at it. Here I am.” Draco held his arms open for Harry.

Harry didn’t want to hurt him, but instead felt a strong urge to sit down in front of the broken man, so he did. “I’m not here for any of that Draco. Like I said, I’m here to talk. Did you and Blaise…break up?”

Draco laughed again, “Oh, poor naïve Potter, you have to be going out to break up. No, Blaise and I were strictly friends with benefits, with heavy _heavy_ emphasis on the benefits. And they were great benefits…top notch really.” Harry could feel his face flushing and Draco gave a devilish grin.

“Oh, come on Potter! Don’t be a prude! Don’t tell me you and Granger never engaged in any…benefits. The whole school knows the two of you have been together for forever.”

Harry couldn’t help his jaw from dropping open. “No-no she’s my friend. We’ve never…just, no. And besides, she isn’t exactly my type.” He had no idea why he said it, but there it was.

Harry saw Draco’s eyes light up, “Wait a minute. Wait a damn minute! Is the Boy-Who-Lived actually…gay?! I knew it!” Harry was strangely happy to see Draco smiling, but the smile quickly faded as he took another drink.

“Draco…what happened…with Blaise? Did you, want more or something?”

Draco let out another laugh and Harry was starting to become annoyed. “No, Perfect Potter. I didn’t want something more with Blaise. We’d been getting into fights for a while now.” Harry immediately thought back to that first night in the bathroom. “He keeps wanting more from me. But I don’t have anything more to give.”

“Oh, I see.” Harry didn’t really actually understand what that meant, but figured he needed to be understanding.

“But don’t you worry your pretty little head about it, Potter. I’ll get him back.” Draco winked and Harry felt his neck heat up again. Harry took this as his cue to leave.

As he stood, he heard Draco whine. “Help me up Potter! You can’t just leave me like this.” Harry extended his hand out and Malfoy took it – hoisting himself up in the air. The two walked towards the door to the bathroom, “See you around Potter” Draco winked and stumbled out and began to walk towards the dungeons.

Harry was having a lot of feelings about the interaction in the bathroom. For some reason, Harry really liked the idea that Draco was gay. It made Harry feel…less alone. He knew his friends supported him, but there something about knowing someone else was like him, that made him feel…right.

There were others reasons he liked the idea that Draco was gay. It freed his mind to play some of the ideas he had been creating since the beginning of term. And that night, with the curtains of his bed drawn closed, Harry reached down into his pants and allowed himself to indulge in some of these ideas.

The next day, as Harry walked into Charms – he noticed a note in his seat. It wasn’t addressed to anyone, but he figured if it was in his seat, it had to be for him.

_Thanks for last night. Let’s continue the conversation. Meet me after dinner in the astronomy tower. – D_

Harry read the note several times before folding it up and putting it in his pocket. He looked around the room several times before he remembered Draco didn’t even have Charms with him. He had to have known that Harry would be in Charms right now….and that this was his seat. Harry felt a strange warmth spread over him.

Harry ate dinner quickly and had to fight off several “You okay, Harry?”s and found himself walking up the astronomy tower earlier than anticipated. When he arrived, Draco was already there. The space looked like he came up there a lot. There were blankets on the ground and pillows spread around.

“Draco, do you _live_ up here or something?” Harry asked as he continued to look around the oddly comfortable space.

Draco hadn’t heard Harry coming up the stairs and spun around, “Please Potter, you think I would live in a tower…? I’m a Malfoy – we have standards.” Harry looked around confused. “I partake in _other_ activities up here…” Draco winked and invited Harry over to sit down.

“Oh. Right…So, how are things with you and Blaise?” Harry was uncomfortable and after his own activities last night and needed to talk about anything other than Draco engaging in…activities.

“Didn’t I tell you not to worry about that, Potter? Blaise and I will be fine, trust me.” Draco gave a sly smile.

“Okay, so then, why am I here? You said you wanted to finish the conversation, but if you don’t want to talk about Blaise, then what do you want to talk about?”

“You, of course!” Harry looked startled at the sudden excitement in Draco’s voice. “Don’t look at me like that. I can count on one hand the number of gay men in our year and using two hands, the whole school. Half of them are trolls and the other half are Hufflepuffs, so let’s say – I’m intrigued.”

“There…there are other gay guys at this school?” Harry was honestly shocked. He never knew…

“Of course Harry! But like I said, they are beneath you. Trust me, you wouldn’t be interested.” Harry felt strange at the thought of Draco knowing what he’d be interested in.

“Then, what do you want to know…? I haven’t… _done anything_ or anything. So, I don’t really have much to talk about.” Harry really didn’t understand why Draco wanted to talk to him about this.

“I want to hear about all of it. Whatever you want to tell me.” Harry couldn’t help but notice Draco sounded…sad somehow. He knew he was still trying to sound confident and suave, like always – but there was something in the way he spoke that sounded like he just wanted company. So, Harry obliged.

He told him about coming out over the summer and about how not many people knew. Harry even told him about Dean…. He wasn’t sure why, but before he knew it – he was spilling everything.

Draco just sat there and kept listening, intently. He never made comments other than the occasional grunt of acknowledgement or “right, uh-huh”. When Harry got to the part about Dean and the kiss, Draco shifted. He looked uncomfortable. When Harry told him what Dean did after, Draco looked puzzled. “Wait. He…turned you down. For the Weasley girl?”

“Her name is Ginny. She’s lovely actually. And he didn’t exactly turn me down…”

“He said he wasn’t interested. Same thing.” Draco looked around the room wide-eyed and with a look of bewilderment. “I can’t believe it…”

Harry was confused. “Why? Dean’s straight…and so obviously not interested in me. What’s so hard to believe?”

Draco snapped his attention back to Harry before relaxing his face, “You’re right, you’re pretty awful.” Harry was taken aback by the comment, but saw Draco crack a smile – so Harry returned it. The smiles quickly turned into outright laughter on both of their parts.

After what felt like hours, Harry found himself in relaxed, normal conversation with Draco Malfoy. He didn’t know why, but he felt like he could let his guard down. This Draco didn’t seem like he wanted to hurt him. This one didn’t seem like he wanted to outright insult him. This Draco seemed like he wanted to be friends… And Harry liked it.

The two boys left the astronomy tower and started walking back to their respective dorms. Harry couldn’t help but feel happy about the night. Talking to Draco was nice…

Harry stayed in his trance all the way back to the Gryffindor dormitory and as he walked through the portrait hole and into the common room. He was so much in a trance that he didn’t notice Ron waiting in the common room. When Harry saw Ron, he smiled but was met with a scowl.

“Harry, where on Earth were you, mate?” Ron sounded concerned.

“I-I just went for a walk…”

“Yeah? Did this _walk_ have anything to do with Draco Malfoy and the reason you scarfed down your dinner like it was the last meal you’d ever get?” Harry was shocked by the actually _correct_ response.

“How-how did you know…?”

“I found this.” Ron held up a small note that Harry immediately recognized. He quickly checked his pockets and realized his note from Draco wasn’t in there.

“Harry, what are you doing? Meeting up with Draco Malfoy late at night? Alone?! He’s bad news Harry!”

Harry immediately turned angry. “He’s not Ron! I know we’ve had issues in the past, but he seems different now!”

“And what about your dad, Harry? He _hates_ the Malfoys – and so do you! They were Death Eaters during the war Harry! They KILLED people!” On some level, Harry knew this was all true and a year ago he would have agreed with his friend, but now…things didn’t feel the same.

“His father was a Death Eater, Ron. Not Draco. And besides – it’s…nice to have someone to talk to you know…about stuff.” Harry immediately saw the hurt look on his best friend’s face.

“You can talk to me Harry! You can always talk to me! You know that!”

“No, Ron. I can’t. There are some things I can’t talk to YOU about.” Harry saw realization dawn on Ron’s face.

“Oh…this is about being gay then, is it? Wait…you aren’t… _with_ Malfoy are you?!” Ron said the statement as if it was the worst idea in the world.

“No, Ron. I’m not. But even if I was, would it be so terrible?”

“Yes. Yes Harry it would! He’s not a good person Harry! Just – just date someone else!”

“I’m not dating him! And it isn’t that easy Ron! People either don’t want me because I’m a guy or only want me because I defeated a dark wizard when I was a BABY. It’s ridiculous!” Harry decided he was done with the conversation and stormed up to the dorms.

Ron must have needed time to calm down because Harry never heard him come back but found him asleep in his bed the next morning. 

**Chapter Nine**

Harry and Draco ended up meeting in the astronomy tower every night for the next 2 weeks. It quickly became Harry’s favorite part of the day. The two talked about literally everything they could think of. But there was one topic they always avoided – fathers. Harry honestly didn’t want to talk about his father nor Draco’s and Draco didn’t seem to want to either. They just pretended like this obstacle didn’t exist.

Harry quickly learned that Draco was extremely intelligent. Some nights, the two of them would bring their homework up to the tower and Draco would help Harry on his potions assignments. Other nights they played games of Exploding Snap or talked about their mutual love of Quidditch. A discussion on Quidditch quickly turned into a ranking of the hottest Quidditch players of all time – with Viktor Krum ranking on both of their lists.

Harry couldn’t help but notice a change in Draco over the two weeks they were together. Draco seemed…happier and more content. There had always been hostility in Draco – even when he wasn’t throwing insults at people, Draco seemed uncomfortable and angry. But this Draco seemed more relaxed. Harry suspected Draco and Blaise had gotten back together, but really didn’t want to know the answer to that for sure.

Unfortunately, Harry ended up getting the answer anyway. During breakfast one morning in the Great Hall, everyone looked up at the same time because they heard a commotion happening in the entry way to the castle. Harry, Ron, and Hermione quickly followed the flood of students who were making their way to the entry way to see what was going on.

They were all met with quite a scene. Blaise was yelling and throwing hexes at Draco, who was attempting to speak but was too busy putting up protection spells for himself.

For a while, Harry couldn’t hear much of anything over the loud blasts from the spells hitting and shattering walls. But eventually, Harry could make out a tone in Blaise’s voice. Blaise was pissed.

Harry looked at Draco and could tell Draco had gotten very uncomfortable when everyone came to watch their showdown. But Blaise looked like he couldn’t care less. That was until he met Harry’s eyes.

“Oh! Perfect! Look Draco! It’s Potter! Or should I say… _Harry_ ” Something about the way Blaise said his first name made him very uncomfortable. Draco’s eyes caught Harry and immediately looked terrified.

“Blaise. Stop it. You’re acting like a child. This is un-dignified. We are Slytherins, we do not do _this_.” Draco was trying very hard to stop whatever it was that was happening.

“You’re right Draco. We are Slytherins. So, why is that YOU of all people won’t shut up about a lousy Gryffindor?!” Blaise fired another hex at Draco which was immediately blocked.

“Blaise. Stop. Now. I’m warning you.” Draco looked frightened and angry at the same time.

“Oh, please Draco. We both know you won’t do anything to me. Especially in front of your _precious Potter._ You don’t want him to think you’re a big bad Death Eater, do you?” Harry was so confused by hearing his name like this so many times. What was Blaise saying and why did Draco have such a guilty look…?

“Come on Draco. Fight back! You want to keep telling me over and over again how we ‘just can’t be together’ and how ‘it isn’t going to work like that with us’ because of what, your family? No, we both know why we can’t be together Draco. You’re too caught up in your precious Potter. Or which way is it Draco, should I say, your precious Potter is too caught up in YOU?” Draco turned bright red and Harry thought he was going to fire the killing curse right then and there.

Harry didn’t understand why Draco wasn’t fighting back. Was he really afraid of firing a spell at Blaise and looking bad for it? Anyone would fire back at Blaise. It would be justified – in self defense even!

Blaise continued, “I’ve tried for so long with you Draco. But I am done! I’m not going to listen to you go on about him anymore. And I’m certainly not going to stick around while we try and pretend like you didn’t say his name yesterday while we were…” Blaise didn’t even get to the finish his sentence, though everyone in the entry way knew what he was going to say. That was it. That was what did it. Draco threw the largest hex Harry had ever seen.

The whole school watched as Blaise went flying straight out the doors of the school. Students started to disperse when they saw McGonagall and Dumbledore, but the two quickly placed a silencing and immobulus charm over the entire room.

“All students are to report to their next class immediately. Any student found in this entry way in the next 2 minutes will earn one month of detention. Go.” Dumbledore released the freezing charm but kept the silencing charm up until students existed the entry way.

Dumbledore’s voice bellowed from the tip of his wand and Harry immediately turned around to find Ron and Hermione staring at him. Harry was grateful they were unable to speak.

Harry followed Ron and Hermione to potions for their first class of the day. As soon as he entered the room, it felt like first year all over again. People were staring at him and he could hear whispers from across the room. Harry was frustrated that Professor Slughorn wasn’t more authoritative in his class and didn’t shut down the whispers. Harry heard them for the rest of class…

As soon as they returned to the Gryffindor common room later that day, Hermione and Ron decided to charge.

“Harry…we aren’t angry…we’re just concerned. Why didn’t you tell us you were with Malfoy?” Hermione’s voice was calm – Harry could tell she had been preparing herself for this conversation since the scene this morning.

“I’m not with Draco! I don’t know what all that was about. Maybe Blaise was upset because we’ve been hanging out, but we aren’t _together_ or anything.”

“I knew you were hiding it from us. I told you you could talk to us. I told you you didn’t have to keep talking to him, Harry.” Ron was pleading at this point and Harry was growing annoyed.

“Ron. Yes, you did tell me that. And I told _you_ that I _liked_ talking to Draco. He’s my friend, Ron. Just like you, except I can talk to him about different things. I like being around him…”

“Oh, Harry…” Hermione’s voice sounded pitiful.

Harry was frustrated with his ‘friends’ and went up to the dorms and closed his curtain. He didn’t want to deal with his friends and if that meant skipping dinner, then so be it.

The only reason he opened his curtains later in the evening was to go and meet Draco in their usual spot. Harry had a feeling Draco probably wouldn’t show, but he hoped he would.

When Harry arrived at the astronomy tower, Draco wasn’t there. Harry decided to wait and took out his homework from the day. He could barely remember even going to classes after the events of that morning, but felt it was best to at least attempt to do work. After an hour, Harry heard footsteps on the stairs. When Draco arrived, he looked surprised to see Harry there.

“After this morning, I thought for sure you would never come back up here.” Draco’s eyes fell on Harry.

“Then why did you come?” Harry stared back.

“I…I hoped you would.” Harry’s felt his heart flutter as he thought back to his own thoughts earlier in the night…

“We-we’re friends. You had a difficult morning, I thought you might need to talk.”

Draco let out a half laugh. “Difficult is one word for it. That difficulty resulted in two months of detention.”

“I’m sorry. Blaise really did deserve that hex though.” Harry tried to wear a sympathetic face.

“Yeah, well…I probably deserved a lot worse. I haven’t exactly been…great to him.” Draco quickly looked down at the ground before finally taking a seat.

“No Draco, he said really terrible things about you. He aired a lot of your personal business to the whole school…I would have done much worse to him. Trust me.” Draco thought back to their incident in third year.

“Yeah. Yeah I bet you would have. That powerful magic of yours would have probably sent him flying all the way into the Forbidden Forest.” Harry laughed…wait, did he just call him ‘powerful’?

“Harry. I feel like we should talk. The things he said…” Harry could tell Draco was struggling to say what he wanted to say.

“It’s fine. I didn’t listen to it anyway. He was just trying to make you angry.” Harry wanted to give Draco an out. An opportunity to disregard everything that was said that morning.

“Yes, he was, but…” Draco was hesitating, “it was all true. Every single piece of it.” He looked at Harry and knew he was likely thinking about Blaise’s last statement. “Blaise had every right to be upset with me. I…I have been talking about you quite a bit.” Draco brought his eyes back down. 

“Oh… I, I see. Well, that makes sense, we’ve been hanging out a lot. He’s probably just jealous.” Harry attempted a laugh. “There’s nothing for him to worry about, right?”

Draco sat in silence, a sudden spark of confidence come across his face, then he looked up to meet Harry’s eyes. “Harry, I like you.”

Harry was shocked by the bluntness of the statement. He opened his mouth to speak, but Draco kept talking.

“I know that it’s dumb. And I also know that I’ve been terrible to you in the past and I know there’s family stuff, but…I-I like you. I’ve liked you for a while…” With the last statement Draco’s voice moved to a whisper.

Harry was shocked. “I-I had no idea. I thought…I thought we were friends…”. Part of Harry knew that was a lie.

“Yeah. We are. And we can continue to be! This doesn’t have to change anything!” Draco was frantic and it was concerning Harry. He had never seen the boy lose his composure like this. Draco looked like something precious was about to be taken from him.

Harry waited a while before responding. He needed time to think….

He thought back to that time on the train before first year. He thought about Draco extending his hand to him. He was actually incredibly rude to Draco – Draco had offered his friendship and Harry turned him away for what? Something his father had told him? Harry loved and trusted his father, but his father’s opinions were of Lucius…not Draco. And who’s to say his father was right…?

Harry kept thinking back to the all of the terrible things Draco had done over the years. But the more he thought about it, the more he was able to see that those terrible things had stopped around fourth year. And this year…this wasn’t the same Draco.

“I think…I think I like you too.” Harry said the words as soon as he realized them.

“…really?” Draco looked at Harry with hope in his eyes.

“Actually, I _know_ I like you Draco. I think I was just…hesitant to acknowledge it.” Draco moved toward Harry but stopped himself from getting too close.

“Harry, I know I’ve done some really terrible things to you (and others) in the past but trust me – that’s done. I’m not that person anymore. I’ve grown up.” Harry nodded and let Draco continue.

“I know we’ve never really talked about me and my ‘coming out’ and I also know you’ve been too polite to ask, but…but I want to tell you. Now.” Harry just continued to nod. If Draco wanted to talk, then Harry would listen.

“I realized I was gay in fourth year. When I started having _feelings_ so to speak. So _,_ I started messing around with a couple of guys in Ravenclaw, if you can believe that. I threatened them that if they ever told anyone I would cast a permanent curse on them that would result in boils popping up all over their face.” Harry and Draco both smiled.

Draco took a breath and continued, “I was having a hard time accepting who I was, and I wasn’t ready to be ‘out’, but by fifth year I was annoyed by having to pretend and decided to pretty much just own it. Most of Slytherin house knew by then, but you know us, we keep our business to ourselves. Well, mostly…” Harry and Draco both thought to the incident from this morning. “But, that’s how I ended up with Blaise. I liked him because he was attractive, available, and discreet. I loved feeling confident about it for myself and I didn’t mind my house knowing, but I wasn’t interested in hearing _other people’s_ opinions on the matter.”

Harry finally decided to speak, “But…what happened? I thought you said you and Blaise were just friends with benefits. This morning didn’t look like friends with benefits… and if that’s all you were, then why were you crying…?” Draco froze. He knew Harry would come back to that. 

Draco turned serious and looked directly at Harry.

“Harry. I’ve thought about you since the first time I met you on the train. I just…I wanted to be your friend so badly, but you rejected me. After that, I decided I was going to make your life hell. Which worked…until fourth year. I saw you at the Yule Ball and you looked miserable with your date, but you also looked…beautiful.” Draco turned quiet and looked back down at the ground. “I told myself that it would never happen and that I needed to move on. Which I did…until this year. When we came back and I saw you staring, I thought…maybe. I slowly allowed myself to think that there could be something between us. Every time you looked at me or I caught you staring, I let myself think more and more. That first night in the bathroom….” Harry watched Draco hesitate.

“It’s okay. We don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Harry was worried Draco would freeze up.

“No, I do. I need to. That first night in the bathroom was the first time Blaise and I got into it about you. He had seen us staring at each other during meals. He had been watching us for a while, I guess. I was scared. I didn’t think you’d want me and so I didn’t want to lose whatever it was I had with him – even if it was just hooking up. I told Blaise he was crazy and that you and I were enemies, but I knew he didn’t believe me. I went to that bathroom to…force myself to get it together. Just to quit with you.”

Harry was starting to piece things together. “Oh….”.

“Yeah. The second time…that was not me at my best. But, Blaise had enough. Obviously, I wasn’t doing a good enough job of hiding my feelings for you and Blaise took it upon himself to out me and our relationship. He told people very…personal things and I was hurt. I didn’t give a shite that he ended things with me. I was upset because now _you_ knew. Everyone knew…After you and I started hanging out, I kept pushing myself to not think about you or think it could be anything more. I went back to Blaise because I knew he was available. He let me because he wanted more from me. It was fine until last night…” Draco got quiet. Harry immediately thought back to Blaise saying, “say his name yesterday while we were…” Harry’s face flushed.

He didn’t know what to say. His mind kept flashing to memories of the two of them in this very astronomy tower talking and laughing. He kept thinking of all the times that Draco smiled at him this year and how it made him feel each time – knowing that you were making someone else happy. And now…this.

Draco couldn’t sit in the silence and continued, “But look Harry…I get it. I know that’s a lot to take in and I don’t really expect anything. I know you say you like me, but I get it if you don’t really want to…” Draco wasn’t allowed to finish his sentence before Harry’s lips were locked on his. It took Draco a moment to process what was happening before committing himself to the kiss, fully. Harry made the kiss more heated and pushed further against Draco.

When the two parted, part of Harry had flashbacks. He thought about his first kiss and the way Dean looked at him after. When he pulled away from Draco – his face was a stark contrast to Dean’s. Draco still had his eyes closed and was smiling…

“Sorry…” Harry felt the need to apologize and wasn’t sure why.

“Definitely nothing to be sorry about Potter. That was…good”. Draco seemed like the wind had been knocked out of him. When he finally got himself back together, he looked at Harry dead-on. “What do you want Harry?”

Harry didn’t know how to answer the question exactly. He knew he wanted more of what just happened but wasn’t sure how much further or more open he was ready to take things. “I-I don’t know. I kind of just want it to be…us for a while.”

“What do you mean ‘just us’?” Draco seemed confused.

“Like, I’m not ready to make anything…public. We have…history and a lot of people witnessed the events of this morning. I don’t know if I want to be seen like that…” Draco smiled.

“I get it Harry. It can just be…us for now. So long as there _is_ an us.” Harry returned the smile.

The two laid together in the astronomy tower for hours that night, alternating between kissing and talking. They would face everything later.

**Chapter Ten**

Harry and Draco continued their meetups in the astronomy tower every night for the next month. Over the course of this month, the rumors and whispers about Harry began to die down for the most part. Once people started to realize they had never actually _seen_ Harry and Draco together, then it quickly became apparent that the two _weren’t actually together._ Harry and Draco’s plan was working well.

Harry liked Draco more and more each day. Now that the truth was out there Draco was noticeably happier. He knew he had Harry and that gave him a sense of confidence. So long as they could live in their astronomy tower bubble…they’d be fine.

But they knew this couldn’t last forever. After their month of bliss in the tower, their world came crashing down.

Blaise was still hurt and was growing suspicious of where Draco disappeared to every night. He decided to take it upon himself to figure it out and followed Draco to the astronomy tower. He knew what Draco used that spot for and decided to wait at the bottom of the tower for enough time to catch Draco in the act.

When Blaise ascended the stairs, he was not disappointed. He found Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter, shirtless, and engaging in a very heated make-out session. The boys heard him let out a soft, “I knew it” before he took off running.

The boys looked at one another and took a breath before Draco finally spoke, “Harry. He’s going to talk.”

“I-I know…”

Draco kept his eyes fixed on Harry, “What do you want to do?”

The more he thought about it, the more he realized his thoughts from a month ago had shifted. He didn’t want it to be just them anymore…he wanted more. He thought about what it would be like to hold Draco’s hand in the hall and share a kiss before walking into class.

“I want you. In the open.” Draco gave a smile.

“Okay, let’s do it.”

The next morning, the rumor-mill was working in overdrive. By the end of breakfast, it was very much known that Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy were an item. The specifics surrounding the couple varied widely. Some heard the truth – they had been found shirtless and making out. Others heard they were caught in the boy’s restroom having sex. And some even went so far as to say the two were running away together… Regardless of the _extent_ of the relationship, once Harry and Draco walked into the Great Hall holding hands, there was no denying it – they were together.

Harry was terrified, but ecstatic. He didn’t care what anyone had to say about their relationship – well, anyone except Hermione and Ron.

Knowing what was to come, Harry had decided to tell his best friends that morning before breakfast. He knew once they got to the Great Hall that all bets would be off.

Harry sat them both down that morning in the common room and told them outright, “Hermione. Ron. I’m with Draco. I like him very much and we’re a couple. We’ve been a couple for the past month but will make it official today. Blaise walked in on us yesterday and I suspect by the time we go to breakfast the whole school will know. So, I’m telling you now, so you hear it from me.”

Hermione smiled, “Harry…we know. You’ve been leaving early from dinner every night for the past month for ‘homework’, yet you aren’t in the library or in the common room. You’re significantly happier than I’ve ever seen you and you haven’t talked about Dean _once_.”

Harry knew he hadn’t been very subtle and _of course_ Hermione had figured him out, but right now, he was more concerned about Ron.

“Ron?”

“I don’t know what you want me to say. Yes, I knew. I told _you_ over a month ago that you two were together even before that little scene with Blaise. I still don’t think it’s a good idea. You dad won’t be happy about it and if I’m being honest Harry, I don’t know if I trust Draco. He isn’t good enough for you.”

Harry loved his friend. He loved him for thinking that and he loved him for always looking out for him, but right now, he needed him to support him.

“Ron, I trust Draco. That’s what should matter. I like him… a lot actually. And as for my dad, well, we will cross that bridge when the time comes. I just need you, both of you, to be happy for me and support me – can you do that?”

Hermione looked at Ron, “Can we do that, Ronald?”

Ron rolled his eyes – he hated when Hermione used his full name. “Yes. We can do that.”

Once word had spread and Draco and Harry made their hand-holding debut, Harry was extremely grateful that he had told his friends ahead of time. The whispers and stares were intense, to say the least. For some reason people were strongly invested in his relationship. And it came from all sides.

Throughout the day, Harry heard everything from “I knew he was a poof” to “doesn’t he know Draco’s father was a Death Eater?” The Slytherins were probably the worst about it. They liked to ‘whisper’ at a level where they made sure everyone could hear them. “Who do you think does what in the relationship?” followed with a “well, if we know anything about Draco…” and then laughter.

Harry spent the entire day scowling at people. He and Draco decided last night that they wouldn’t give into any of the whispers and would keep their head held high. They had nothing to be ashamed about.

Luckily, this only went on for a week before everyone became slammed with work before winter holiday.

Winter break came too quick for Harry. He was excited to go home, but it was bittersweet. He wasn’t ready to leave Draco. They discussed writing, but felt it was probably best if they didn’t. Neither of them wanted to address the elephant in the room…their fathers. So instead, they pushed it off until the last day and even then, the conversation was short.

The two found themselves in the astronomy tower, once again. Even after their relationship became public, this spot still felt…right for them. The night before they were set to leave, the two had decided to further their relationship. Harry still wasn’t ready to move _much_ further, and he knew Draco had more experience than him, but he wanted to end their first semester together with something special.

Harry decided to escalate their normal make-out session. When Draco arrived at the astronomy tower, Harry pushed him against the wall and kissed him hard. Harder than he ever had before. The two continued this way while Harry allowed his hands to roam Draco’s body all the while gaining his own confidence.

When Harry dropped to his knees he was immediately stopped. “Harry…what are you doing? You don’t have to do that.”

Harry looked up at Draco and quickly realized he liked this angle. “I know. I want to…I’ve wanted to do this for a while. So, just let me, okay?” That’s apparently all Draco needed to hear.

When the two finished, Harry moved Draco down to the ground with him and laid them both down – flat on their backs.

“That was…” Draco seemed unable to form words. He just looked over at Harry and smiled.

Harry smiled back, “I’m going to miss you…”

Draco propped himself up on his elbow and looked at Harry. “I’m going to miss you too. But it isn’t that long…we’ll be back in this exact spot before you know it.”

“Should we…should we write?” Harry didn’t know why he asked the question. He wasn’t prepared to tell his father about Draco just yet and knew if he was constantly sending his owl, Hedwig, out – his dad would start to ask questions.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea right now.” Harry was sad, but relieved by this answer.

“Yeah…probably not.” Was all Harry could muster in response. He moved over and Draco opened his arm for Harry. Harry laid on Draco’s chest for as long as possible before they knew they needed to get back to their dorms.

They left for winter break and Draco kept his word – he didn’t write. Harry was conflicted – part of him hoped an owl would arrive in the middle of the day with a surprise letter from Draco, but another part of him was terrified of receiving a letter from Draco and having his dad see it.

Harry tried to enjoy his time at home, but a large part of him missed Draco. He had to keep reminding himself that it wasn’t a long time to go without someone…especially someone you just started dating. It had only been two months and Harry felt like a lovesick fool.

Harry forced himself to interact with his family and went to the Burrow on several occasions over the break. He ate meals, opened gifts, and flew around on his broom…all the while thinking about Draco. As stupid as he felt, he hoped Draco was thinking about him too.

When they arrived back to Hogwarts, Harry couldn’t contain his excitement. He spent the train ride catching up with people and couldn’t get to Draco. As soon as they started their walk into Hogwarts, he quickly scoured the heads around him for blonde. When he finally locked on eyes on him, he rushed over. Before seeing Harry, Harry could tell Draco had a hardened look on his face. Harry was nervous to approach the man but had waited too long to see him to NOT run up and kiss him.

As soon as Draco saw Harry, his face changed. It looked like he was dropping a mask he had put on and revealed what laid underneath. Draco kissed Harry back, then broke away, “Goodness Potter. Wait till we get in the castle – don’t want to give these young kids a show.” Draco smirked, but Harry kept his grin.

Before they knew it, they had settled right back into the same routine. They walked each other to class, kissed in hallways, and spent their nights together in the tower. They only time they parted was during meals where their houses were separated and to sleep.

The second term flew by quick. Their schoolwork was increasing with difficulty, but that just meant Harry and Draco turned their last night activities into study sessions…followed by activities. Most of the school had gotten over seeing the two of them together and by March, all whispers and stares had stopped. Blaise continued to be a nuisance, but Harry figured he must have given up on Draco because he too eventually stopped glaring.

Harry’s goal for the second term was to integrate Draco into his life with Hermione and Ron. The first time Draco ate with them in Hogsmeade…things were awkward. Nobody knew what to say.

But Harry was persistent and by the fourth weekend things were running much smoother. Hermione and Draco soon bonded over schoolwork – a conversation Harry and Ron were happy to be left out of. Draco and Ron were more difficult to get past, but once Draco brought up Quidditch, Ron was sold. Harry had told Draco ahead of time that Ron’s favorite team was the Chudley Canons and while they were easily the worst team in the league, Draco still pretended like they were “one of his favorites”. He even went so far as to throw in, “they just haven’t had their year yet”. This planted a permanent smile on Ron’s face and kept him talking for hours.

Seeing Draco interact with Hermione and Ron and watching his two best friends embrace Draco made Harry’s heart swell. Over the course of the term he knew he was falling harder and harder for Draco.

It happened in little ways really. Draco had an off hour while Harry had herbology and without fail, Draco would be waiting outside the greenhouse to walk him to his next class. Harry started to love the way Draco would push him in potions. This was easily Draco’s best subject and arguably Harry’s worst. But Draco wouldn’t listen to that – he insisted that everyone had the potential for greatness when it came to potions. You just had to practice and study – which is exactly what Draco helped Harry do. Thanks to Draco, Harry received an ‘exceeds expectations’ for his potions OWL last year and now he was on track to receive the same on his NEWTs next year.

Draco didn’t say it aloud, but he knew he was falling for Harry too. Little things Harry did were big for Draco. Draco spent _years_ thinking Harry would never want him, could never want him. But Harry _always_ reached for Draco’s hand when they walked down the hall. He always showed up to the astronomy tower first and he always made Draco feel like the most important person in the world.

The year was beginning to wind-down and Harry was getting nervous. He knew he barely held it together over the winter break – he didn’t know how he was going to handle an entire summer. The day before the end of term, Harry and Draco found themselves in their usual spot doing their usual…things when Draco slowly pulled back from Harry. Harry was sad at the loss of contact but looked into Draco’s eyes and felt a sudden rush. Draco was staring directly into Harry’s eyes…

“I love you Harry Potter.” Draco held Harry’s gaze and didn’t look away.

Harry’s heart soared. He immediately kissed Draco before realizing he didn’t say anything back and pulled away. “I love you too”, then proceeded to kiss Draco more.

Harry continued the kiss and followed Draco as Draco moved Harry on his back. The two continued in this position until Harry pulled back and looked at Draco – taking him in. “Draco…I think I’m ready”.

Draco’s eyes widen, “Your sure? This is a big step, we don’t have to…”. Without hesitation Harry responded, “yes”.

An hour later, Harry found himself back in Draco’s arms – his “spot”. Harry had so much he wanted to say but decided on the one thing he _needed_ to say. “Draco, I want us to write to each other this summer. I know we said there were complications and I know we aren’t ready to tell our fathers, but I don’t think I can go a whole summer without hearing from you.”

“I agree.”

Harry wasn’t prepared for this response. He sat up on his elbow and looked at Draco who was smiling at him. “You agree? You’ll write? You promise?”

“Potter. I’ll write. I promise.” Neither Harry nor Draco were in any rush to get back to their dorms that night. The next day the two of them sat next to each other on the train ride home and said their goodbyes. As sad as Harry was to see Draco go, he was excited to be home with his parents for the break. He just needed to figure out how to hide Draco’s letters…

Barely a week into break and Harry received his first letter from Draco – as promised. The letter was long and in Draco’s beautiful handwriting. The contents of the letter were a mixture of poetry and filth. Harry loved the way Draco could be so sweet and tender but turn heated real fast. Harry tried to respond with the same length and heat but had to rush the ending when he heard his father coming up the steps to his room.

They strategized that they would only write once a week – to lessen the amount of times an owl would be at a window at either of their houses. And for the first month of break they stuck to this routine.

But by July Harry started to receive fewer letters from Draco. Two weeks would go by, then three.

Harry was starting to worry. Not hearing from Draco made all kinds of thoughts flood into Harry’s brain -none of them good. Harry felt better when he finally received a letter from Draco on his birthday, but it was short and didn’t explain why he had been away. Harry wrote several letters back – each time trying to space them out so Draco wouldn’t get in trouble.

The lack of communication from Draco was starting to take a toll on Harry’s ability to act normal around his parents. After the letter from his birthday, Harry became insufferable. He knew he was being rude to his parents and he knew they only wanted to talk to him, make him feel better – but he couldn’t bring himself out of it. He had a bad feeling in his stomach.

After a rather heated argument between him and his father about Harry’s “attitude”, Harry finally snapped. He broke down crying in the middle of the kitchen and didn’t stop until his mother hugged him and brought him to sit down in the living room.

He wanted so _badly_ to tell his parents about Draco. Draco made him so happy and he loved him. He wanted to share that with his parents, and he knew if he did then they would be able to talk him out of all these terrible thoughts he was having about Draco’s lack of communication. But he also knew how his father felt about the Malfoys…

Harry decided to stay silent. This only prompted his parents to worry more…and it wasn’t long before they called in reinforcements. When Harry saw his Sirius and Remus walk through the door later that night, he rolled his eyes. Of course his parents brough them over… Oh, and of course his parents are going out for a ‘date-night’…how convenient…

Harry was sitting on the sofa when his godfathers came to sit in the armchairs across from him. He felt this made it look like an interrogation and also felt that was likely what was going to happen.

“We heard you’ve been being a little shit around the house” his godfather Sirius spat out as soon as he sat down. “We know you’re going to tell us eventually…so go ahead, out with it”.

Harry couldn’t help but comment on the difference between this conversation and their conversation when he came out. “I thought you two would be better about this…more…sympathetic”.

“Harry, we were sympathetic about you coming out because we understood that was a big step for you. But we aren’t going to sit around while you make yourself (and your parents) miserable. So tell us, what happened?”

Harry knew Remus was right. He had no reason to act this way towards his family. “Fine. I’ll tell you. But I need _advice_ , okay? I’m not going to break up with him or anything. I love him. So I need you two to help me figure out how to tell mum and dad…and to tell me I’m not going crazy.”

“Oh, it involves _love_ does it?” Remus sounded all too happy to discuss the situation now.

“Harry…why would we tell you to break-up with him? If I’m being honest, I’m a little concerned now.” Sirius sounded unsure of where this conversation was going.

Harry told them everything. Yes, everything. He didn’t give _details_ or anything, but he didn’t really have anyone else to talk about some of the things with and decided his godfathers were probably his only option. When he finished, he couldn’t help but notice the look of concern and pity on both of their faces.

“Harry…” was all Remus could let out.

“And you say you love this boy? Like, actually love him? Not just an infatuation or something because he was your first?” Sirius was more confident about what he wanted to say.

“Yes. I love Draco Malfoy. And no! Not just because of that!”

Remus and Sirius looked at each other and shared a look that Harry figured meant they were communicating without speaking. When they finally broke their gaze, Sirius looked at Harry.

“Okay. But your father won’t like this. I mean, I believe you Harry if you say he’s different, but your father holds a very strong grudge against Lucius Malfoy. This is the man that followed the darkest wizard of all time. A wizard who came on a mission to kill you. Your father won’t give that up.”

Harry knew this was true. He had heard it a million times growing up. He knew all about what Lucius Malfoy had done, but if this was the case – then he would have to show his father that Draco was not his father.

“Harry, if it will make things better for you, then tell your parents. Just be prepared for a not-so-accepting outcome at first. They love you so if this is real like you say it is, then they’ll support you eventually… as for the lack of communication, people do get busy Harry. It’s possible he’s just…pre-occupied. I wouldn’t worry about it just yet.” Once Remus stopped speaking, he and Sirius got up to hug Harry.

When Harry’s parents came back that night, the first thing Harry did was apologize for his behavior. He sat them both down in the living room and braced himself. “Harry, you already told us you were gay son…What on earth could this be about?” James tried to make a joke but was too nervous to fully commit.

Before Harry could fully prepare himself, he was speaking. It was all coming out. Everything. Well, not _everything_ – he decided to leave certain parts to just he and his godfathers. Harry tried not to look at his parents while he spoke, instead choosing to focus on the floor or a wall.

When he finished, he was met with silence. He finally decided to look and saw mixed faces on his parents. His mother looked…sad. Maybe it was concern. His father on the other hand was not sad. Harry honestly couldn’t figure out what the expression on his father’s face was. He watched as his father looked straight at Harry, then the floor, then around the room before slowly standing up. Harry didn’t know what to do, so he just continued to stand there. James left the room without a single word to Harry.

Harry didn’t know what he was expecting, but this certainly wasn’t it. His father didn’t just _not_ speak to him. Harry turned to look at his mother whose eyes had followed her husband out the room before looking back at Harry.

“Harry…your father is…just worried is all. I don’t think he was expecting that…” Lily let out a breath and moved towards her son. She hugged him tight, then released and look at him, “Harry…you love him?”

“Yes.” Harry meekly let out.

“And he loves you? He takes care of you?”

“Yes.” Harry answered more firmly.

Lily inhaled, “Well, then we will figure it out. I’ll talk to your father.” She hugged her son one last time before she too walked out the room.

Harry was left with a very strange feeling. This wasn’t normal. His parents didn’t act this way to him. These were the parents that didn’t scold him for earning detention and scooped him up in their arms when he came out as gay. Not the ones who…left the room.

Lily must have spoken with her husband that night because when Harry came down to breakfast the next morning, James was ready to talk.

“Harry. I’m sorry for leaving you like that yesterday. I should have handled it better…I just wasn’t prepared for that.”

Harry sat down at the table across from his dad, his usual spot. He opened his mouth to speak but was silenced by James continuing.

“17 years ago, my son was nearly taken from me. An evil man walked into this very house and rendered your mother and I useless. I thought I would wake up to find my entire family murdered…”

“Dad…” Harry tried to interject as he watched his father’s eyes become misty.

“No Harry. Let me finish.” Harry closed his mouth.

“But this wizard did not take my son and he did not kill my family. Instead, my son _killed_ him. And while we don’t know how, we do know that you are strong Harry. I’ve spent my whole life trying to protect you. I talked a lot about Death Eaters because I wanted to make sure you understood that men like Lucius Malfoy were evil…I did this so you could stay away from these people. That was me trying to shield you from the evils in the world. But that was also me not remembering how strong you are. I’m not going to pretend like I’m happy about this, because I’m not. But I’m going to trust my son and defer to his judgement. If you say Draco is not his father, then I believe you.”

Harry didn’t know how to take this conversation. On one hand, he knew his father said he would trust his son and that’s really all Harry wanted. But he also said he wasn’t happy for him… and that part hurt. On some level Harry knew this was a possibility.

“Draco isn’t like his father. And I’ll make you see that. I think you’d actually really like him…”

“Maybe, son.” And at that, James ended the conversation.

**Chapter Eleven**

Tensions continued to be high as the summer began to wind down. Harry tried to listen to his godfathers and not worry about Draco’s lack of communication, but he couldn’t shake the feeling in his gut that said something was wrong. When it came time to board the Hogwarts Express, Harry was all too excited to be getting to see Draco and leaving the tension between he and his father. After a lot of talking, James finally agreed to let Harry bring Draco home for Christmas. This was going to be Harry’s opportunity to show his father just how _good_ they were together.

As soon as he stepped on the train, he searched for Draco but couldn’t find him anywhere. When students began to walk into Hogwarts, Harry looked around for that familiar blonde head. He spotted Draco far off in the distance talking with Crabbe and Goyle. Harry ran up to him, but as soon as Draco saw him Draco looked away and walked off. Harry stood in front of the castle confused.

Harry could barely keep his focus during what would be his last start of term feast. When Dumbledore rose to speak, Harry tried to fix his eyes on this older man but was immediately drawn to trying to meet Draco’s eyes at the Slytherin table. Draco hadn’t looked at Harry once…what was happening?

Harry was too preoccupied to catch most of Dumbledore’s speech, but the part he _did_ catch was when Dumbledore explained the staffing changes for the year. “As you can see from our table here, we have a new face joining us. Please join me in welcoming an alumnus back to Hogwarts. After his successful career with Puddlemere United, Oliver Wood has decided to come back as an apprentice to Madame Hooch. Professor Hooch will be retiring after this year and is looking to train Mr. Wood as her replacement. Now, while Mr. Wood is not a professor…yet. He should be treated with the same respect.” At that Dumbledore smiled over to the man at the far end of the table who stood up and gave a small wave.

Harry felt like his brain short circuit. Oliver Wood. Was back at Hogwarts?

Oliver looked around the room quickly before moving to sit back down in his seat. Just as he was about to sit, he made eye contact with Harry and gave a smile. Harry returned the smile, but quickly looked down at his plate.

Harry spent the remainder of the feast alternating between trying to catch Draco’s attention and trying to _not_ notice that he had Oliver’s. After dinner ended, Harry couldn’t take it anymore. While all the students were trying to exit the hall, Harry made his way to the astronomy tower. If there was any place to meet Draco, it would be their spot.

Harry waited three hours, but for the first time in their relationship…Draco didn’t show.

The next day began the start of classes for their final year at Hogwarts. Harry knew this was a big day. He knew he should be preparing to enter his NEWT-level courses with his undivided attention. But he couldn’t. Last night sealed the deal on Harry’s worry over Draco. He needed to talk to him.

Harry tried to find Draco all day but didn’t know Draco’s new schedule and their joint Defense class wouldn’t be until Wednesday… Harry continued to think of ways to reach Draco while making his way down to the Quidditch pitch for practice.

He was so lost in his own thoughts that he failed to hear someone calling his name from behind him. It wasn’t until hands were on his shoulders that he even realized someone was there.

“’arry! You’re a hard one to catch, arn’ya? Thought I was going to have to break into a full jog.”

Shit. Harry forgot how sexy Oliver Wood’s Scottish accent was.

“Oh…um, sorry Oliver. Or…Mr. Wood?” Harry didn’t know how he was supposed to address him now.

“Oliver is good. Let’s leave the formal title for those who _haven’t_ seen me in a Quidditch changing room.” Did Oliver Wood just…wink at him?

Oliver walked with Harry as he continued down to the pitch. Harry tried to let out a laugh, “Right… Um…So, I didn’t know you’d be coming back. Must be weird being here…especially after you thought you’d gotten out.”

“Not really. I mean, yes, it’s strange to be back but…Hogwarts always felt like home to me. I thought about writing to tell you I was coming back but thought it would be more fun as a surprise.” Oliver’s smile hadn’t changed one bit. And Harry knew that smile well… Looking at Oliver had memories flooding back.

Also, did Oliver say he was going to write to _him_ about coming back? Not the rest of the team…?

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I love Hogwarts too. I’m terrified to leave.”

“Please. A lad like you? You’ll have plenty of options when you get out of here. Your future is too bright for you to be terrified.” Oliver spoke to Harry like they’d been friends for years. Harry thought talking to Oliver again after all this time would be strange, but they seemed to settle back into their natural rhythm.

As the two walked side by side, Harry couldn’t help but notice how much the man had changed in the past four years. Professional Quidditch suited him… His chest and arms had filled out more and Harry noticed a beautifully even tan spreading across the man’s exposed skin. 

Once they reached the pitch Harry looked over at Oliver, expecting him to head back to the castle. But instead, Oliver gave a wave and said, “I’m gonna watch practice from over ‘ere! Can’t wait to see how the team is doing!” before moving to head up to the stands. Harry moved into the changing room and found a giddy Oliver Wood still sitting in the stands, ready for practice. This guy really loved Quidditch.

Harry tried to concentrate on his first practice of the year, but his mind kept alternating between Draco’s sudden dismissiveness and Oliver’s sudden…presence. Harry was exhausted after only going at it for an hour and decided to call it for the day. The rest of his team looked just as relieved as him – the first day of classes was difficult for everyone it seemed.

As they were heading towards the changing room, Ron caught Harry’s attention. “Oi! You see who was at practice?”

“Uh, yeah. Oliver. I know. He walked to the pitch with me.” Harry tried to say it as if it didn’t matter.

“Shite Harry. This is Oliver Wood! You had the _biggest_ crush on him back in third year.” Ron had pushed into his arm before they made their way into the room to change.

“What? No I didn’t!” Harry knew he wasn’t convincing anyone.

“Mate. Okay, the first two years I understood. I thought he was a genius at Quidditch too. His speeches were really…moving. But third year…Harry you cried when he left. Like, actual tears. Then tried to give us some lame excuse like ‘the team is just going to really change without him’.” Harry rolled his eyes as Ron pretended to cry into his hands.

“Oh, piss off Ron.” Harry and Ron changed and started to head back to the castle. Ron continued to make fun of Harry all the way back to the school. “Mate, the curtains in the dorms close, but they aren’t sound-proof. You were engaging in a lot of solo activities third year…and now that I know you’re gay, I would bet good money they involved a certain Quidditch player’s… ‘Wood’.” Harry laughed at the terrible use of Oliver’s name, but stopped dead in his tracks when he entered the school and saw Draco there, standing and what looked like waiting on him.

“What’s this about a Quidditch player’s wood?” Draco’s voice sounded playful, but his face did not mirror this.

“Oh! Nothing. I was just teasing Harry about the little _crush_ he had a few years ago. And wondering how it took us so long to figure out he was gay.” Harry hit Ron in the stomach to get him to stop talking.

“Ron, why don’t you go up to the dorm. I’ll be there in a bit. I need to speak with Draco.” Harry watched as Ron left up the staircase.

“A little crush, huh? And…wood? This wouldn’t have anything to do with the new _professor_ , would it?” Draco kept his tone playful and relaxed his features a bit.

“He’s not a professor, he’s an apprentice. And Ron is just being…annoying.” Harry was annoyed that _this_ is what they were talking about and shot back quick. “And this is besides the point, what the hell Draco? What’s going on?”

Draco’s face hardened again. “…what do you mean?”

“What do I mean?! How about not sending me a single letter since _July_ when you promised you’d write. I was worried _sick_ all break! I came out about us to my parents and you weren’t there to talk to! You’ve avoided me since we’ve been back – you couldn’t even _look_ at me last night.” All of the emotions Harry had been feeling were tumbling out of him.

“You told your parents about us?!” Draco fired back furiously.

“That’s all you heard! Out of all that – THAT’S what you choose to comment on?! Where were you Draco?”

“I had things to take care of over the summer… and we said we’d wait to talk to our parents, Harry! That’s what WE decided. Together. You had no right to tell them.”

Harry couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “You had ‘things to take care of’. What about me?! What about taking care of ME!? And I only told them because I was miserable, Draco! I had to tell _someone_ what was going on. And why won’t you acknowledge the fact that you’ve been _avoiding_ me?”

“I can’t take care of you all the time Harry. I have other shite going on, you know? You should have told me you were telling them, Harry.”

“When would I have told you Draco? In the letters I _never_ got a response from? Or how about on the train when I _suspiciously_ couldn’t find you? Or how about in the astronomy tower? Or wait, you never showed…”

“You know what Harry. This was a mistake. I can’t deal with this right now. We weren’t ready for this.” And just like that…Draco walked away.

Harry felt his world come crashing down. He had been so angry just minutes ago, but now felt…pain. He wanted to yell, “Wait! Come back!” but couldn’t seem to find his voice. He just kept hearing Draco say, “I can’t take care of you.”

…was his father right? Was this all just a mistake?

But no matter how much Harry thought about it that night, none of it made sense. Why had Draco stopped writing? Why didn’t he want to see Harry? Why didn’t he talk to him? ‘Things to take care of’? What _things_?

This didn’t feel like the same Draco who had told Harry he loved him just three months prior. Or the one who laid on top of him that night in the astronomy tower. Harry felt like he didn’t know this Draco…

The next morning, the Hogwarts rumor-mill was back up and running. And if Harry thought in his final year he would be immune to being involved, he was wrong. He wasn’t sure how, but someone found out about his and Draco’s argument last night. And just like last time, the rumor varied person to person.

Harry heard everything from, ‘Yeah, I heard Harry found Draco _cheating_ and that’s why they broke up’ to ‘Apparently Harry’s parents found out about it and **forbid** them to be together’ and while that last one wasn’t a far stretch, Harry couldn’t help but be annoyed. Regardless of the details of the rumor, it was clear to everyone…Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy were over.

Harry spent his first week of his last year in shambles. He managed to tell Ron and Hermione what happened but was very clear that he wasn’t interested in any of their _advice_ or ‘I knew this was going to happen’. His friends respected his wishes and just listened…and hugged.

Harry thought about Draco every morning when he woke up and every night before he slept…if he slept. He made sure to stay clear of him during the day and not make eye contact in any of their shared classes. Two weeks went by and Harry still wasn’t okay, but at least he was managing to get at least 5 hours of sleep and eat a meal or two during the day.

Harry found himself staring, lost, into the common room fire when, seemingly, out of nowhere, a body plopped down beside him. Harry looked to his right and saw the face of Dean Thomas.

“I heard what happened…with you and Draco…I’m sorry.” Dean alternated between looking at Harry and looking down at the fire.

“Oh…thanks. But you don’t have to…console me or anything. I’m fine.” Harry tried to shake Dean off, but Dean wasn’t having it.

“I know you Harry. I’ve known you for 6 years and just because we don’t hang out like we used to, doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. And… I know that a lot of us not hanging out has to do with me and how I handled our…situation, but…”

“Our situation, Dean? It was one kiss. You didn’t like it and that was that.” Harry couldn’t help the bitterness that was rising in his voice. For some reason, talking to Dean and hearing Dean’s _apology_ was too much to take in.

“Right, well, still…I’m sorry Harry. I’m sorry for what happened between us and I’m sorry for what you’re going through now. That’s all I wanted to say.”

“Well…you said it.” Harry hated the way he was sounding. Dean moved to stand up from the couch, but Harry reached out. “Dean, I’m sorry. I’m just…I’m not okay. Thank you…for trying”. Dean smiled and nodded his head before heading back towards his own table to study.

**Chapter Twelve**

Three weeks into term and Harry was starting to become overwhelmed. Harry knew his NEWTs classes would be difficult, he just didn’t realize he would be going through…whatever this is while taking them. His stress was making it more and more difficult for him to focus on Quidditch, but he knew he couldn’t push it off any longer – he needed to have tryouts.

Harry found himself walking towards the Quidditch pitch Friday evening after a very long week of classes and crying. Once again lost in thought, Harry flinched as he felt a familiar set of hands on his shoulders. When he turned to look, Oliver Wood was making his way around Harry.

“Harry! Just the man I was looking for!” Why did Harry’s heart flutter? Harry, he meant _actually looking for_.

“Hey Oliver! What can I do for you?” Images appeared in Harry’s head of what he could do for Oliver and Harry forced himself to re-focus.

“Thought I would come and watch tryouts, if that’s okay with the _captain_.” Harry liked the way Oliver slightly leaned into his arm as he said _captain_.

“Well, you gave me that title – so I guess I don’t really have a say.” Harry couldn’t help the smile that crept upon his face.

Oliver returned it and continued, “Sorry I haven’t been around much. My goal was to help with practices and be more present for all teams, but Hooch’s course load is insane. And let me tell you ‘arry, teaching first years how to ride a broom is more taxing than you could possibly imagine.”

Harry let out a small laugh, “I bet.”

“Yeah, can’t all be naturals like you. Do you remember that time in your third year when we played against Slytherin and Malfoy saw the snitch? But you came out of _nowhere_ and swooped in and snatched it right out of his face?!” Oliver noticed Harry’s face drop at the mention of Draco.

“Oh…shite ‘arry. I’m sorry. I didn’t…I thought that was a rumor or like a joke. I didn’t know you were…” Harry jumped in before Oliver could finish.

“Gay?”

“No. Um, not that. I just didn’t know you and Draco were…real.”

“Oh. Um, well yes to both I suppose. I’m gay and Draco and I are… _were_ real.” Harry’s heart dropped as he spoke the last words. Part of him had begun to doubt if they were ever…real.

“If it’s not too much, I mean, we haven’t really talk talked in a while, but…why did you guys break up?”

Harry wasn’t expecting Oliver to be this invested. “Oh. Um, he just felt we weren’t meant to be.” Harry tried to sound nonchalant, but weeks of crying and frustration just couldn’t be masked.

“He broke up with you?” Harry didn’t understand why Oliver highlighted the ‘you’ at the end of that question.

“Yeah, but it’s fine. I’m good. Really.” Really. He wasn’t.

Harry wanted to change the subject, quickly. “Why are you coming to watch a whole bunch of second years tryout? It’s a Friday night…don’t you have better things to do? Shouldn’t you be taking some girl out to Hogsmeade or drinking in a pub with your Quidditch mates?”

Oliver let out a laugh, “Well, I _like_ Quidditch try outs, no matter who it is trying out. And actually, my boyfriend and I broke up six months ago.” Harry just stared.

“Oh…um, I didn’t realize… I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, well, he played for Puddlemere too. The break-up wasn’t pretty so I felt it was time to find my place elsewhere. And my Quidditch mates took sides…well, took a side – his. So, here I am.”

“Oliver… that’s terrible.”

“It’s not so bad. We really weren’t meant to be. He went to Durmstrang and was essentially molded into a professional Quidditch player from the age of like 8. He thought brawn was better than brains. And don’t get me wrong, brawn is really _really_ nice and all, but if it’s all a guy has…I’ll pass.” Oliver winked at Harry and he felt his face flush.

They arrived at the pitch and Harry watched as Oliver made his way to the stands. “Oliver! Why don’t you stay down here with me? You can help me make my decisions.” Harry watched as Oliver’s face lit up.

Another month went by. Another month of Harry going to classes, doing homework, going to Quidditch practice, and avoiding Draco. Harry felt he was getting…better. He was thinking of Draco _less,_ which isn’t hard to do when he’s all he thought about before.

In the beginning of their breakup, Harry went to the astronomy tower every single night. Part of him knew Draco wouldn’t be there, but just being in their space made Harry somehow feel whole. But in the past month, he forced himself to stop. He tapered off. Three times a week, once a week, once every other week….and now, never.

He even went to Hogsmeade with Oliver and he helped him pick out new gloves for the upcoming match against Hufflepuff. Harry and Oliver were slowly becoming…friends? Well, they were kind of friends before, but this was different. Harry and Oliver in the past had been more like…Oliver and his much younger teammate, Harry. But now the four years didn’t feel like so much. This felt…equal.

By November Harry was starting to feel like his old self. He found himself more focused on his classes and with the help of Oliver, more focused on Quidditch. By now, he knew Oliver was out-right flirting with him. Oliver wasn’t shy about it and Harry liked that. Oliver seemed to know exactly what he wanted. Harry.

Harry allowed himself to flirt back. Some strange part of him still felt like he was somehow cheating on Draco. But he guessed that was the same part that thought he’d wake up tomorrow and the two of them would still be together…

These were the thoughts going through Harry’s head as he sat at breakfast one morning with Ron and Hermione. In an act of deja-vu, Ginny approached the table with her usual, “Did you hear the rumor?” except there was no excitement in her voice. Instead, she sounded…torn. And she looked directly at Harry.

“No…what Ginny?” Ron must have also sensed the tone in his sister’s voice because he sounded like he didn’t want to hear this rumor.

“Well…I don’t know if it’s true, but…” Ginny was hesitant. “Just say it Ginny! The rumors at this school usually have _some_ ounce of truth to them!” Seamus was always open to a good rumor.

“Well…I heard from Pansy Parkinson that Draco is…getting married.” Harry could actually hear his heart stop. He heard its final beat, then nothing else.

“Married?! That’s ridiculous! We’re 17!” Hermione sounded outraged.

“Well, I don’t know. Pansy won’t shut up about being a bridesmaid and Crabbe and Goyle keep fighting over best man…” Ginny was trying to give all the information she had.

Dean, being the sweet man he was, asked “…is it to a boy…or…a girl?”. Without missing a beat, Hermione and Ginny spoke at the same time.

“Surely it’s a boy!” “A girl.”

Everyone turned and looked Ginny. “Draco….is marrying…a girl?” Ron sounded confused. “Ginny, are you sure your sources are correct. This doesn’t sound right.”

“I’m just saying what I heard….”

Everyone had turned to look at Harry. Harry felt…nothing. His whole body was numb. His brain was blank except for the words ‘Draco’, ‘married’, and ‘girl’.

Before he knew it, he was out of his seat. If it wasn’t time for their first class, Harry would have looked ridiculous getting up the way he did. But everyone in the Great Hall was getting ready to transition to their first class so Harry had to fight through what felt like a mountain of first years to get to Draco.

He found Draco in the hallway outside of Charms. He ran up to him and without thinking threw him up against the wall.

“You’re getting fucking married?!” Harry looked directly into Draco’s eyes while he had his arm against his throat. He could feel his magic coursing through his entire body.

Draco shoved him off, “What the hell do you think you’re doing Harry?” Draco looked terrified.

“What the hell am _I doing_ Draco? What the hell are you doing?! You’re getting married? To…to some girl?!” Harry couldn’t even believe what he was saying. It took every ounce of him to push down his magic, force some sort of control.

Draco quickly noticed the crowd that was gathering around them and grabbed Harry by the arm and threw him into an empty nearby classroom.

This sudden change in scenery changed Harry’s mood. The anger left his body and all of the sadness he had felt for the past three months hit.

“I-I don’t understand…I’m so confused Draco. Help me understand. How do you go from loving _me,_ having…sex with me, and saying you want to be me with me….to…married?”

Draco’s face was cold. “What did you expect to happen Harry? I’m a pureblood. I’m the Malfoy heir. I _have_ to get married.”

“Wait. So you _knew_ this would happen. Even when we were together? You knew you’d be getting married.” Harry didn’t understand any of this.

“I-I…yes and no. I….” Draco was having a hard time forming words. He took a deep breath and let it out. “Harry. This is what is expected of me. We don’t all have the luxury of having gay godparents and parents who accepted us ‘for who we are’” Harry didn’t like Draco’s patronizing tone.

“Is this…is this what you had to ‘do’ over the summer?” Things were starting to fall into place.

“Yes. Discussions took place this summer. Arrangements have been made…we marry after graduation.”

Harry didn’t understand. None of this was making sense. “Why didn’t you tell me?” was all Harry managed to get out of his rattled brain.

He was met with silence. Draco refused to make eye contact.

“Did you ever actually love me…?” Harry forced himself to ask the question.

Silence.

Before the tears could hit, Harry ran. He ran all the way up to his dorm, where he intended to stay for forever. Forget classes. Forget friends. Forget…everything.

Harry spent the next few days holed up in his bed. He just kept replaying scenes from their relationship.

No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t figure out what had gone wrong. Why had Draco said he loved him if he didn’t? Was Harry just another _friend with benefits_? But, no, he said all those things…he said he had liked Harry for a long time… he got in fight with Blaise about him…this just didn’t make any sense.

Harry gave up trying to talk to Ron and Hermione. Neither of them fully understood. Hermione was _furious_ , she never stopped yelling. Harry knew she meant well, but he just couldn’t stand to hear one more time how, ”He should never have played with you like that Harry! It’s simply barbaric! He should have told you!”. And Ron wasn’t any better. Ron stayed silent for the most part, but Harry knew it was because he was holding back an “I told you, mate”.

It was also at this point that Harry began to realize his two best friends were…more than friends. Harry knew this would happen eventually, but he also knew he wouldn’t be able to be around it right now. Hermione and Ron seemed to be around each other _all_ the time and Harry could see their hands grazing one another from time to time. Harry was happy for them, but he was mostly just happy they were good friends and weren’t flaunting their relationship in front of him.

After days of this, the only thing that got him out of bed was Quidditch. It was something to put all of his thoughts into, something to allow him to _not_ think about Draco for least a couple of hours every day. He started training the team hard. He would have them train and train until finally someone said, “Harry…I think that’s enough for today.”

Oliver continued to come to practices. Harry liked him there. He was a sense of stability during a very unstable time.

Two weeks after the incident with Draco, Harry and Oliver were walking back to the castle after a rather late night of training. They had started a discussion about the upcoming winter holiday and Harry had asked, “What are you plans? Going to Scotland to see your parents?”

“Actually, they’re traveling this year. So it looks like, for the first time in my time here at Hogwarts, I’ll be part of the stay-back group.” Harry couldn’t help but hear the sadness in his voice.

“Oh, I’m really sorry Oliver.”

“It’s alright ‘arry. Probably best this any way. All this Quidditch has really put me behind in my studies with Hooch. It’ll be good to have some alone time to catch-up.”

“Right…well, you could come to my house for Christmas.” Why did he say that…?

“Really?”

Well, you already said it Harry. Can’t take it back now. “Yeah. My parents won’t mind. You can at least come for Christmas day. It’ll just be me, my parents, and my godfathers. Nothing fancy or anything, but you’re welcome to come.”

“That’d be…great actually. Thank you.”

“Brilliant. I’ll write to my parents first thing tomorrow.” That was going to be a fun letter….

Harry stressed all night about how he was going to tell his parents about Oliver coming while also remembering his dad was expecting Draco. Honestly, he knew his dad would be happy to hear that Draco wouldn’t be there…but he didn’t know how he’d take Oliver coming.

After a lot of tossing and turning, Harry decided the best way to do this was to be direct. Clear. No room for conversation.

_Mum and Dad,_

_I have invited Oliver Wood to spend Christmas Day with us in Godric’s Hollow. He has nowhere else to go. Draco will not be joining us._

_No – I don’t want to talk about it._

_I’ll see you at the train station next week._

_Love, Harry_

There. No room for discussion.

If Harry’s parents were surprised, they didn’t mention it in their letter back. They simply responded back with a _“You know anyone is welcome to our home. It was very sweet of you to invite him. Your mother will be at the station at noon. Love, Your father”._

**Chapter Thirteen**

Winter break came fast. Before Harry knew it, he was making arrangements with Oliver for Christmas Day and packing his trunk to head home. As soon as he was back home, he began to stress about Oliver coming. He knew he had invited him, but part of him felt like maybe it was a mistake.

If his father wanted to comment on the Draco situation, he didn’t. The only person who brought it up was his mother.

“Harry, is everything okay with Draco?” She asked timidly after dinner on Harry’s first night back.

“No. And I don’t want to talk about it. You and dad can sleep easy knowing your son is safe from the evil Malfoy family.” He bitterly shot back at his mother before removing himself from the table.

That was the end of that conversation.

By the time Christmas Day came around, Harry was down-right nervous. He’d been around Oliver loads of times by now, but there something _intimate_ about Oliver being in his home, with his family, for Christmas. Harry changed his clothes three times that day before he finally heard a knock at the door.

“I’ll get it!” He came running down the stairs in his final outfit choice – dark jeans and a maroon button-up.

When Harry opened the door, he couldn’t help but notice how…handsome Oliver looked. He was also wearing dark jeans and a maroon crew neck. But, unlike Harry, he was wearing a black jacket that looked so soft Harry wanted to reach out and touch it. He also couldn’t help but notice…they matched.

“Happy Christmas ‘arry” Oliver beamed at him as he opened the door. Oliver was holding flowers in his hand and started to make his way into the house. He had barely shaken off the snow from his shoulders when Harry could hear his mother, father, and godfathers enter the entry way.

“You must be Oliver!” Lily went to embrace the new man in her home.

“Happy Christmas Mrs. Potter, these are for you.” Oliver held out the flowers for his mother and was met with a, “Aren’t you sweet! And it’s Lily. Happy Christmas Oliver”. Harry couldn’t _not_ notice how happy his mother seemed.

The rest of his family began to make their ways towards him, making their introductions and shaking hands. If Oliver was intimidated by the three men, he didn’t show it. If anything, Harry thought Oliver looked rather…comfortable.

The family, with Oliver, made their way into the living room where Lily had prepared hot chocolates and eggnog for the family to enjoy before Christmas dinner and gifts. His family took this time to interrogate Oliver.

“Well, Oliver, what have you been up to? I feel like I knew everything about you four years ago, but now…nothing.” Sirius shot Harry a knowing smirk before turning back to Oliver.

Oliver didn’t acknowledge the comment, but simply gave a polite smile and said, “Well, sir, I played professional Quidditch with Puddlemere United for three years before making my return to Hogwarts this year. I’m apprenticing to be the new flying instructor next year – once Professor Hooch retires.”

“Harry! You didn’t tell us Oliver was back at Hogwarts with you this year!” James turned to look at his son. Harry couldn’t help but notice the comment, ‘at Hogwarts _with you_ ’.

“Oh, that’s quite alright Mr. Potter. Harry’s had enough to worry about this year…” Harry was afraid Oliver was going to bring up Draco and tried to shoot him a look, but found Oliver was looking straight at his father. “You know, with this being his last year and all. It can be quite stressful. I remember my last year – the classes were insane. Harry’s handling it much better than I did. _And_ he’s leading Gryffindor to a house cup win…it’s impressive.”

Harry relaxed and let a smile come across his face. He never will get over hearing Oliver Wood compliment him.

“Call me James, please. And yes, I suppose you’re right. It’s just we would have thought Harry would have mentioned it if _Oliver Wood_ was back at Hogwarts.” Harry felt his face flush and looked to his godfather who was trying his best to hold back a laugh.

“I think what James is trying to say is this a delightful surprise Oliver. We’re happy you can join us.” Thankfully Remus came to his rescue and hit Sirius in his side to stop him from laughing.

The three men, well James really, continued to grill Oliver. Harry grew nervous as the conversation made its way to Oliver’s personal life. His mother had just entered the room and asked, “So, Oliver, Harry has told us that you didn’t have anywhere to go. That’s so sad – I’m so very sorry. Where is your family at? No special someone to spend your holiday with?” Lily looked as if she didn’t mean to ask the last question.

“It’s quite alright Mrs”, Oliver stopped and was met with a hard stare from Lily before continuing, ”… _Lily_. My family decided to travel this holiday and I’ve never had a steady enough boyfriend to spend holidays with. So, here I am. I’m just thankful Harry pitied me enough to invite me – it’s really kind of you and your family to invite me into your home.” Oliver smiled. Lily was beaming.

Sirius made a noise and Harry shot him a look. He was met with his godfather giving him a wink. Harry rolled his eyes and tried to steer the conversation back to a safer topic.

“What position do you play Oliver? I know in the past, Harry mentioned you were a keeper – did you keep that position with Puddlemere?” James looked happy to bring the conversation back to Quidditch.

Oliver took a drink of eggnog before answering, “Yes sir. With my build, keeper’s the best position for me I believe.”

“Well, I always said – a seeker is nothing without a good keeper behind him.” As soon as James made the comment Sirius let out a laugh he had been holding in for far too long. Harry shot him a death glare before his father commented “What? What did I say…?”

Oliver looked towards Harry and winked. His father had just made a highly suggestive comment and Oliver Wood _winked_ at him… Oliver Wood was in his house…. Harry couldn’t help but think how his 12-year-old self would be feeling right now.

Harry was saved from further embarrassment by his mother coming to announce that dinner was ready. The family made their way to the dining table to begin their feast. Oliver and James continued in conversation throughout dinner. The smile from James’ face from earlier never left. He was thoroughly enjoying Oliver being there.

As he sat there, eating all of his favorites, on his favorite day of the year…with all of his favorite people – well, _most_ of his favorite people, Harry’s mind began to wander. He knew his family was loving Oliver. Every single member of this table was eating up every word Oliver spoke. He bonded with James and Sirius over a love of Quidditch. Apparently Oliver loved to cook and therefore had plenty to discuss with Remus who kept picking his brain about recipes. And Lily was impressed with Oliver’s high marks in school, his excellence with Charms (his mother’s favorite subject in school), and his desire to return to education. “I always told Harry that education is the most important thing a young witch or wizard can have. Magic is nothing without your ability to control it and use it properly.”

But amidst all of this, Harry kept thinking how different this would be if Draco were here. Like he was supposed to be…

Harry wondered if these people would have given him the same welcome, bonded with him over the same topics. Draco and Oliver were very similar – both valued their schooling and took great care to make their families proud. Both men loved Quidditch and excelled at it. And both men took care of Harry…or at least _used to_.

It soon became time to return to the living room for gifts. Everyone took turns opening and before they knew it, the room was covered in bright paper. Lily and James brought out their wands and began the process of cleaning up the room when Harry noticed Oliver bring out a small box. “I have just one more for you Harry.” Harry looked down at the box and back up at Oliver. He also noticed that his parents and godfathers shared a look.

“Oh, you didn’t have to get me something Oliver. I-I feel terrible. I didn’t get you anything.” Harry was getting nervous. He could feel a lot of eyes on the two of them. Oliver didn’t seem to mind or notice.

“It’s nothing big. Just something I wanted to do for you.” Oliver shot him that smile and Harry felt his heart flutter.

He opened the box and found a small, white card. It looked kind of like the ones he collected as a kid that he would find in the boxes of chocolate frogs, except this one didn’t have as many colors or embellishments on it. It had the face of a man who was moving and information below that read:

_Anton Marigold_

_Owner and Head Coach of the Montrose Magpies, Scotland_

Below the information was what looked like an address and more statistics about the coach. Harry looked up at Oliver, “I…I don’t understand.”

“I wrote some letters and spoke to a few of my old Quidditch connections. Anton is one of the premiere coaches in the league right now and he’ll be looking for new recruits for next season. He’s coming to Hogwarts in two weeks to see you play against Ravenclaw. He’s interested in you.”

Harry thought his father was going to cry right then and there. “Harry’s going to play professional Quidditch…?”

Harry didn’t know what to say. Luckily, Oliver spoke for him, “Well, sir, that’s up to Harry. But I know he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do after Hogwarts. I wanted him to know he had…options. It’s just a tryout – nothing’s solid.”

“Oliver this is…amazing. Thank you…” Harry moved to give Oliver a hug and caught Remus’ eyes before looking away.

The room began to disperse and make their way back into the kitchen to prepare dessert. Oliver and Harry were left alone in the living room next to the Christmas tree.

“Oliver, this is truly an amazing gift. I don’t know how to thank you enough.”

“No thanks needed Harry. I believe in you. You can do anything you want after Hogwarts, and like I said, I just wanted to make sure _you knew_ you had options. Remember Harry, your future is bright.” Harry felt like his heart was going to burst. He felt a strange sensation wash over him as he looked up and saw mistletoe above them.

“You’re pretty good at charms, huh?”

“Yeah, well. Flying is just _one_ of my many talents.” Oliver gave Harry a smile before moving in to kiss him. Harry met Oliver’s lips and kissed back. In this moment, he felt…solid. All of the thoughts of Draco and the breakup and the wedding…just stopped. It was like he froze in time.

If his eyes had been open, he would have noticed his mother entering the room with a tray of desserts, followed closely by the rest of his family. Harry would have never known they had an audience if it wasn’t for his godfather’s whistling. Harry would be having a conversation with Sirius later.

When the evening came to an end, Harry had to pry Oliver out of his family’s hands. His mother and father were all too happy to offer Oliver to stay the night, “It’s far too late for you to apparate back to Hogsmeade! And you’ll have to make that walk back to Hogwarts _alone_. It’s just not safe.” His mother insisted.

“Lily, I promise I’ll be fine. You have all done enough for me already. Really.” Oliver gave his award-winning smile and Harry saw his mother give-in. “Well, alright, if you say so.”

Harry kept trying to push Oliver towards the door, but his family kept wanting another hug or to say just one more thing. “Don’t be a stranger Oliver!” James wasn’t ready to let this man leave.

“Oh, something tells me he won’t be…” Sirius shot Harry a cheeky smile.

Once his family had enough, Harry walked Oliver out the door and down the pathway towards the street.

Oliver turned towards Harry, “You know, if I didn’t know any better, I would say a certain someone used to have a crush on me.” Oliver looked down at Harry with a devilish smile.

Harry felt himself blush and a smile move up on his face, “I assure you – I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Mmm – so that comment about knowing a lot about me…what? That’s just because you talk about all of your teammates when you come home for holidays?” Oliver wasn’t giving up.

“I mean, basically. Well, the really cute ones at least…” Harry was feeling braver.

“Oh, so you think I’m cute… Interesting.” Harry rolled his eyes. “Okay – I think these compliments are getting to your head.”

Oliver moved in and kiss Harry. This kiss was different from the one inside. This one wasn’t sweet, it wasn’t due to a mistletoe – this one was purposeful. Harry felt this kiss with every fiber of his being. 

When they pulled away, Oliver’s eyes were closed, and he was smiling. Harry watched as his eyes slowly opened and looked right at Harry.

“Happy Christmas, Harry Potter.” And just like that, Oliver was gone.

Harry spent the rest of break dodging questions from his parents and godfathers about the man. As perfect as the moment was…his heart still felt as though he cheated. As soon as Oliver left, Harry’s mind went back to Draco.

Harry turned bitter and couldn’t help but think about kissing Draco in front of the Christmas tree. If Draco were here, Harry would have fought to have him be able to stay the night. Harry thought about what they could have done that night in his room…alone.

**Chapter Fourteen**

Harry returned to Hogwarts for his final term with an empty feeling in his stomach. He was not ready to leave this place. He decided to turn his attention elsewhere and focus on his classes and his upcoming Quidditch tryout.

Harry noticed a change in Draco once they returned. Harry could swear he felt that the boy was trying to talk to him. He would catch him in the hallway, walking towards one of Harry’s classes, but when Harry went to approach – the man would walk away. There were times when they would pass each other in the hall and Harry thought he saw Draco’s mouth open to say something, but when he looked closely, the mouth was closed, and the man was soon gone.

When the day came for the match against Ravenclaw, Harry was all nerves. He tried to focus on the game but kept distracting himself by finding Oliver in the stands – smiling. When the match was over and he got the snitch, Harry descended on his broom and met his team with yells of triumph and hugs.

Oliver found him on the field and immediately scooped him up into a hug, whispering “I knew you’d be brilliant” in his ear before putting him down. Harry felt a shiver run all over his body.

A man he knew only by picture approached him and introduced himself. “Anton Marigold, Mr. Potter. Impressive flying today. I can see why Oliver spoke so highly of you in his letters. I don’t know what your plans are post-graduation, but I’m happy to offer you a place on my team next year. If you’re interested.”

Harry’s eyes went wide, but he tried to keep his composure. “Um…thank you sir, thank you very much.”

“That sounds like a ‘yes’, but I’ll send over the proper paperwork via owl in the next few weeks.”

“I look forward to it, sir.” Harry put his most confident voice on.

As soon as Marigold left, Harry immediately turned to Oliver. Most of the people from the match had disappeared by then and were going back to the castle for celebrations. Harry knew he and Oliver were the only ones left on the pitch but had a strange feeling they were being watched. Harry shook it off as paranoia and re-focused on the beautiful man in front of him.

Oliver looked at Harry, “What did I tell you, Harry Potter? Your future is bright.” And kissed him. Right in the middle of the Quidditch pitch…and it was perfect. Harry felt his knees go weak and his heart stop.

The two were broken apart by a cough coming from somewhere behind them.

“I guess you got what you wanted Potter.” Draco’s voice cut into Harry immediately. He thought he had seen Draco in the stands earlier, but thought he might be imagining things…

“This isn’t a good time, Malfoy. Why don’t you go back to the castle?” Oliver’s voice grew confrontational.

“And what? Miss out on Harry Potter living out all of his childhood fantasies? Having Oliver Wood fuck him in the middle of the Quidditch pitch?” Harry’s face flushed and he noticed a familiar slur in Draco’s words. Draco was drunk…again.

“That’s enough Malfoy. Go.” Oliver’s chest had grown, and he was standing slightly in front of Harry. Harry felt that this position made it look like he was protecting Harry…but Harry didn’t understand from what.

Harry pushed himself from behind Oliver and shot back at Draco, “You’re drunk. You’re always drunk. What’s wrong Draco? Troubles with the future _wife_?” Harry didn’t recognize his own voice.

Draco’s eyes moved from Oliver and right on Harry. “What do you care? You know, I came to talk to you – congratulate you for your win, but I see you have someone to do that for you.” Harry noticed the hurt behind Draco’s words.

Draco took one final look at the two of them before moving to go back towards the castle.

As hurt as Harry was, he was also furious. Who did Draco think he was deciding _then_ was the right moment to talk? What about the past four months when Harry received nothing but _silence_ from the man? What about all the nights Harry waited for him in the tower only to be left sitting alone and miserable?

Without thinking, Harry looked at Oliver. Oliver was perfect. He was strong, and brilliant, and successful and…he wanted Harry. Harry took Oliver’s hand and started leading him towards the Quidditch changing rooms.

After doing a quick glance around, Harry threw Oliver up against the wall and got his lips on his throat. Oliver quickly caught-on and flipped Harry around and started to take off his Quidditch robes. Without their mouths ever leaving one another – the two men were quickly down to their shorts. Harry felt adrenaline coursing through his veins. As much as Ron was teasing him, Harry had to be honest with himself – this was _definitely_ a fantasy Harry had at 13.

Oliver moved to turn Harry around and started kissing his neck and reaching for the waistband of his shorts. But right as a finger was hooked into the band, Harry heard Oliver let out a loud groan and hit the wall beside Harry’s head. Before he knew it, all of the heat from his back was gone.

Harry flipped around and saw Oliver with his head in his hands and moving towards a bench to sit down. “No Harry. I’m sorry. This isn’t how this is starting. I can’t just _pretend_ like I don’t know what you’re doing…I was there Harry. Right next to you with Draco said all those things. I was there when you two broke up – I’m not going to act as some…rebound for you.” Oliver spoke very fast and Harry’s brain couldn’t catch up.

Oliver moved his eyes to meet Harry’s and continued, “I like you Harry. I like you a lot actually. And I’m willing to wait for whatever this is with you and Draco to be done, but I’m not going to be the person you sleep with before eventually getting back together with him. And I know this is partially my fault. I shouldn’t have pursued you – I should have waited. And I _definitely_ shouldn’t have allowed you to bring me in here.”

“Oliver…” Harry really didn’t know what to say. He felt foolish, standing almost naked against this wall. He also felt very embarrassed, because Oliver was right….

“Figure this shite out with Draco, then come find me Harry. That is, if you’re still interested…” and just like that, Harry’s fantasy was over. Oliver dressed himself as Harry stood, immobile. Then walked out the room.

For a boy who spent a lot of his time thinking he would never find someone…he sure did ruin two relationships fairly quickly.

He was so conflicted. He knew he liked Oliver. Hell, he had liked Oliver, in some way shape or form, since he was 11.

He also knew this year was different. Oliver was by definition, perfect. He liked Harry. Harry liked him. And he was _adored_ by Harry’s family…

But Harry didn’t love him. And he knew he might find love for him later, after spending more time with him, but he also knew this was a childhood crush. And most people never have a chance with their childhood crush, so maybe he was just trying to live-out some fantasy world his 11-year-old self had created.

A fantasy in which the strong older boy swept him up on his broomstick and they flew off into the night sky together. One in which Harry saw Oliver spending holidays in Godric’s Hollow and Harry spent summers in Scotland.

It was scary how much he thought about that as a child…and even into his teenage years. But by then, his thoughts became more heated. He thought about how this man could take him into the Quidditch changing room showers and unravel him slowly.

But that’s all this was. A childhood fantasy. And after all the fantasizing, he was still left with the same thought as before…he loved Draco Malfoy.

As much as Harry wanted to be mad at Draco…he couldn’t. Harry allowed himself to watch Draco over the next couple of weeks and began to notice how skinny Draco had gotten. He always appeared for meals but didn’t seem to eat anything. He also never saw Draco smile…even when Crabbe or Goyle would be howling at the Slytherin table, Draco would be staring off into space.

One month after the altercation on the Quidditch pitch, Harry heard a familiar sound on another one of his nightly walks. He walked into the boy’s lavatory and found a familiar sight…Draco was on the floor. Completely disheveled. But this time, Harry didn’t see a bottle anywhere in sight.

When Draco noticed Harry enter, he tried to fix himself. He sat up and began to slick his hair back. “What is it with you and restrooms, Potter?”

“What is it with _you_ and restrooms Draco?”

Draco let out a small laugh, “Good point.”

Silence fell between the two before Draco moved to speak, “So…Wood, huh? Can’t say I blame you…he’s quite fit.”

“Yeah…well…that may be true, but we aren’t…together or anything.” Harry felt the need to defend this to Draco. Draco seemed to perk up at the comment before Harry continued. “What about you? Making plans for the big day?” Harry watched as Draco’s face fell again.

“Oh, right…that. I’m not really involved with that sort of stuff. I just…show up.”

Harry felt foolish asking the question, but couldn’t help himself…”Do you…love her?”

Draco shot Harry a look of shock. “Of course not. I barely even know her. She’s from Beauxbaton and has been chosen by my parents. I’ve had exactly one conversation with her and that was about school…”.

“Then, then why Draco? Why put yourself through this?” The more Harry talked to Draco the more he missed him. He knew he shouldn’t be in here and it wasn’t good for him to be having this conversation, but he didn’t care.

“Because I have to! I don’t exactly have a choice Harry! This is what we do…”

“I don’t understand Draco. I’ve spent _months_ trying to figure this out. I know you loved me, Draco. I know what we had was real…I just don’t understand what happened.” Harry expected to be met with the same conversation they had before break. But when he looked at Draco, he wasn’t met with a cold hard face – he was met with tears.

“My father happened, Harry. He found your letters…I had been keeping all of the letters you wrote me from the first month. I wanted to be able to go back and read them…but that was foolish. I should have been smarter about it.” Harry watched Draco’s face fall before he continued.

“When he confronted me about them, I didn’t want to lie…I thought if I just told the truth and told him that we loved each other…maybe he would care that his ONLY SON was happy. But he didn’t care. Actually, he was furious. He took my owl and locked her away. I snuck out of the house and used an owl from an owlery nearby to send you the letter for your birthday.” Draco paused. So much was starting to make sense to Harry. This is why he didn’t hear from him…

“I was going to tell you when we got back to Hogwarts, but my father started marriage discussions in August before we came back. By then…it was too late. I felt it was best if we just…ended things. Part of me thought about telling you. That’s why I waited for you that day after Quidditch practice, but when I saw how hurt you were…I just couldn’t add to that. I knew it was best for you if we just dropped it. Let you move on…and you did.”

“You think I’ve moved on?! Draco, I’ve spent _months_ feeling some of the worst pain I’ve ever felt. I’ve forced myself to think terrible things about myself, about you. I have most certainly not ‘moved on’. I wish you would have just…talked to me. We could have figured something out, Draco.”

“What’s there to figure out Harry? I’m getting married. That’s that. My father will never allow us to be together. I have to do this…”

“I don’t give a damn about your father Draco. This is _your life_ and _you decide_ who you marry and when. You should do it out of love, not out of obligation.”

“That must be very easy for you say Harry. Your family is perfect. You’re their perfect son – the boy who defeated Voldemort. The boy who joined his house team in his _first year_. The boy who became Quidditch captain. If the rumor mill is true, then the boy who is going on to play professional Quidditch. And the boy who is going to give them the perfect strapping, Quidditch super-star son-in-law. Our lives are very different Harry.”

Harry was scared by how much of that was true. Except for the son-in-law part, Draco had shown how privileged Harry really was.

“Do you love me, Draco?” Harry needed to know.

“Of course I love you Harry. But it isn’t that simple.” As terrible as this conversation was, there it was – Draco did love him.

“Then we will figure it out. I don’t want to be without you Draco. And I know you don’t want to be without me.” Before Harry could continue, Draco was already moving towards him. Draco wrapped his hand around the back of Harry’s neck and brought him in for a hard kiss. Harry could taste the tears from Draco’s face as he kissed back.

When they broke apart, Draco continued to hold Harry. “You have to be strong Draco. If this is what you want, then you have to fight for us.” Harry spoke in a whisper.

Draco mirrored his tone, “I- I don’t know if I can…”

“That’s the only way Draco.” They continued to hold each other while Draco broke down.

After the night in the bathroom, Harry and Draco resumed their routine meetups in the astronomy tower. They needed to discuss their plan of action for how to get Draco out of this marriage.

The two met up every night for the next three weeks. Hermione and Ron were quick to notice a change in Harry, but thought it was due to his new relationship with Oliver. When they asked him about it, Harry was very quick to dismiss the idea.

“You seem chipper Harry, this wouldn’t have anything to do with a certain _Quidditch player turned teacher_ would it?” Hermione smiled as she sat next to Harry on the sofa in the common room while Harry was trying to catch-up on his classwork.

“What? No. I’m not with Oliver.” Harry knew his tone was harsh, but he was very busy. He needed to get this work done so he could go to meet-up with Draco.

“You’re…you’re not? But I thought, I thought he came to your house for Christmas. And rumor has it that you were kissing him on the Quidditch pitch last month.” Harry turned to look at his friend.

“Well, yes, that’s all true. But…I’m…I’m not with Oliver like that.”

Hermione and Ron gave Harry a confused look. “Then if you’re not with Oliver, mate, what’s going on?”

Harry hesitated. He couldn’t tell his friend what was going on with Draco. They’d try and stop him. They’d tell him it was a bad idea and to just move on. So, he lied.

“Nothing. Just happy is all. We’re about to graduate. I’m going to go on to play professional Quidditch, Ron is going to be an ass-kicking auror and Hermione is off to do her favorite thing in the world – continue school.” Hermione and Ron weren’t convinced but chose to drop it anyway.

Before things continued with Draco, Harry knew he needed to talk to Oliver. He found the man sitting outside one Saturday afternoon and decided to approach.

“Oliver…? Can I sit with you?” Oliver looked up at Harry with an unidentifiable expression.

“Of course.”

“I…wanted to talk to you. About that night in the changing room.” Harry paused and saw Oliver’s face drop to the ground.

“You were right. And I’m sorry. You deserve so much more than to be someone’s… ‘rebound’.”

“So, I take it you’re back with Draco then, huh?”

“Yes.”

Oliver stared at Harry for a long time before eventually speaking, “I’m happy for you Harry. You deserve it. If he’s who makes you happy, then…I’m glad.”

Harry was surprised by the reaction, “Oliver… you made me happy too. And if Draco didn’t exist…” Oliver cut Harry off before he could continue.

“You don’t need to console me Harry. It’s fine. I get it.” Harry noticed Oliver’s tone change. It sounded like Oliver was done with the conversation. The conversation left Harry with an unsettled feeling.

After a solid month of planning, Harry and Draco figured out a plan. After graduation, Draco would return home and pack his bags. He’d leave a letter for his father explaining everything and would leave Malfoy Manor in the middle of the night. He would apparate to Harry’s parent’s house, then the two would leave for Scotland the next morning.

They knew this plan was cowardly, but no matter how they tried to work it out, they just couldn’t figure out a plan in which they could convince Lucius to cancel the wedding. So, they’d flee.

They had the plan for merely 12 hours before it exploded in front of their faces. The next morning, as the two were heading to their first class, they made a spontaneous decision to be a little late for potions that day and sneak off instead.

They found themselves in a hallway, Draco up against a wall, and the two making-out and groping at each other before a voice caught their attention, “Draco.”

Draco froze. He would know his father’s voice anywhere. Harry felt a chill run over Draco before he backed away from him.

“D-dad, what. What are you doing here?” Draco was trying to fix himself and tucked his shirt back in. Harry didn’t know what to do – so he just stood there.

Over the years, Harry had seen Lucius Malfoy on several occasions. There were times in Diagon Alley when the Potters would run into the Malfoys while doing back-to-school shopping. In those moments, there were harsh words muttered under the breaths of the patriarchs of both families and fierce glances between the sons. Then there were times when Lucius would come up to the school for matches or meetings.

Regardless of _when_ Harry had seen the man, he never changed. He always wore all black robes (similar to Draco’s in fourth year – immaculate, cost a fortune) and carried an intimidating walking stick. His hair was the same color as his son’s, but he wore his long and allowed it to frame his face in a way that made him look even more intimidating than he already did.

“We have a meeting with Dumbledore to discuss some items for the Hogwarts School Board’s next meeting.” Draco soon noticed his mother was standing right behind his father.

Lucius continued to stare a hole into his son. “Draco. We discussed this. You are not to have any contact with…Mr. Potter.” Lucius made a quick glance towards Harry and said his name like it was a curse.

“You are to be married Draco. This…” Lucius motioned between Harry and Draco, “This…can not happen. I thought I made myself very clear.”

Draco looked defeated. Harry wanted to shake him – sure this wasn’t how their plan was going to go, but now is the time Draco!

Harry was the first to speak, “Mr. Malfoy…I love your son. I love him very much.” Draco looked up quickly at Harry before turning his face towards his father.

“And I know I’m not…a woman. And I know I can’t give you or your family an heir…but I will take care of your son.”

“As nice as that all is Mr. Potter, Draco is a pureblood – he has an obligation to this family. We have already made arrangements with the Greengrass family. Draco _will_ be married.” Lucius’ tone never changed.

Forgetting she was there, Narcissa Malfoy stepped from behind her husband. “Draco…Draco honey…you need to think about this. Carefully. This is your future at stake…”

Draco looked at his mother. Harry knew Draco loved his mother dearly. He didn’t fear her like he did his father, but he also knew his mother rarely disobeyed her husband – and promoted Draco to do the same.

Draco finally decided to speak, “I’ve thought about this mother. A lot. I love Harry.”

Narcissa approached her son and looked him the eyes. Harry could tell Draco was trying not to cry. She took her son’s face in her hands and looked as though she was studying it for a long time. When she finally spoke to her son, it was barely above a whisper. “Does he make you happy?” The woman refused to lose eye contact with her son.

Draco gave a sniffle before answering, “yes”. Narcissa tore away from her son and looked at Harry. Her eyes were piercing, but Harry stood firm beside Draco.

Narcissa moved back towards her husband. “Lucius, we’re leaving.” Harry heard her tone change and now sounded much stronger than she had before.

“Narcissa!” Lucius hissed out the name before he was met with a hard look from his wife.

“We’re leaving. Now. Lucius.” She turned back to Draco. “Your father and I will discuss this.”

Lucius shot Harry one last look that Harry noticed looked worried.

As soon as the Malfoys were gone, Harry turned to Draco. Draco’s expression was of pure shock.

“I-I can’t believe that worked…” Draco sounded exasperated.

“Based on your father’s expression, I don’t think this is the end of this Draco. But it’s a start.” Harry moved to hold his boyfriend. Before moving back towards their class.

**Chapter Fifteen**

When Draco received a letter one week later, Harry figured Narcissa must be stronger than she looked.

_Draco,_

_We have discussed your upcoming nuptials and have decided to place the wedding on hold. We will be writing to the Greengrass family and letting them know that you wish to continue your studies before settling down. We will also be informing them that they are to make other arrangements for their daughter – as our son will not be getting married any time soon._

_There is one stipulation to this – regardless of your relationship with Mr. Potter, you must produce an heir. You are the last of the Malfoy line and as such it is your duty to carry on the name. I have been looking into this and it appears that are a number of options for this including a surrogate._

_You are young. You do not need to figure this out now, but you do need to be thinking about it._

The handwriting at the bottom of the letter changed.

_Your father doesn’t know I’m writing you this last part –_

_Draco, the only thing I wanted for you in your life was to find happiness. You said marrying this girl and fulfilling your duties to this family would make you happy, but I see now that that was not the truth._

_Harry makes you happy._

_I always dreamt of your wedding day, but I didn’t picture it with any person in particular. The only thing I saw was love. I am proud of you for finding someone you love and who loves you back. Your father does not feel the same, but he will come around._

_We love you very much Draco,_

_Your parents_

Draco read the letter three times before giving it to Harry. When Harry was finished, he looked at his boyfriend and saw him crying.

Graduation came too quick for Harry. He thought he would be sad to leave Hogwarts, and on some level, he was, but he was also thrilled for the new chapter of his life. Harry had asked Draco to come to Scotland with him. Draco could continue to study potions at the Scottish Wizarding School for Continuing Education and Harry could play Quidditch.

Draco agreed without hesitation. The two were set to leave one week after graduation.

After Narcissa’s letter, Harry decided to write a letter to his own parents. He knew he had a lot he needed to say, so he invited them to come and meet him in Hogsmeade. They agreed and Harry brought Draco along with him.

Harry told his parents everything. He told them about the break-up with Draco, the marriage arrangements, and the letter from the Malfoys. He also told them about his plans to leave.

By the end of the conversation, his mother was crying. His father just kept looking back and forth between Draco and Harry.

“Harry… you’re…you’re sure about this?” James addressed his son without looking at Draco.

“Completely sure, dad. I love Draco. I want to be with him.”

“But-but what about Oliver…” Harry heard the sadness in his father’s voice at the loss of his super star possible son-in-law.

“Oliver and I were never together, dad. And I’m sorry that Draco isn’t what you wanted, but like I told you before – if you get to know him, I know you’d really like him.” Draco felt uncomfortable. Harry was speaking as though he wasn’t there. So, he decided to make himself known.

“Mr. Potter…I love your son. Very much. I’ve loved him for a very long time. Longer than he probably knows. I already thought I lost him once…I don’t plan on that happening ever again.” That’s all it took for Lily. She moved out of her seat at the Three Broomsticks where they were having lunch and gave Draco a big hug. Draco hesitated before returning.

James continued to look at his son. “I’ve only ever wanted the best for you Harry. If this is what you feel will make you happy, then I’m okay with it.” Harry knew it would take his father some time to come around. But he also knew Draco and he knew Draco would be determined to win him over.

Draco and Harry left for Scotland one week after graduation. They rented a flat near the Montrose Magpies training camp and Draco started at his school around the time Harry started training.

Harry couldn’t believe what his life had become.


End file.
